So my ex who wouldn’t leave me alone because she thought I was the best person in the world even though will has a better haircut then me but anyway when we broke up she said I was the worst person she ever met and I told her she looks like a cross between a beaver and a mole rat. Then I told her she has the wendys logo haircut and then some other things I’m not gonna say. 2 years of bullshit I was done Anyways she cried lol
What do you call lesbians having sex? My cheating dyke ex wife!
My ex died in an anchorage accident. She always was a sleeping hooker.
one day my ex best friend lied about his computer died when he left the call and watched youtube
I took my son to a drivers school and am surprised because he got his license but soon lost the privilege to drive a car because he ran over my ex on “accident” (I gotta go pay him out of jail)
My ex was so full of shit,she probably poured toilet cleaner in her nose to get relief.
Roses are red violets are blue were breaking up because I never love you
When you want to see and smell your ex for the last time,look at a ugly dog,and smell the garbage
Granny’s says. don’t worry the crys of pain are only my ex husbands
What do you call a mix of nuts, bolts, and my ex?
i was hit by a car later my ex lost her bus job
“today was the word day ever”,“why”, because my ex got his by a bus, and i lost my job as a bus driver".
On my signal, I would like you to drive onto the pavement (sidewalk) and run over my ex-wife.
Me:Whats that sound? Ex:What? Me:oh its the elevator going up. BYEEEE see you on another level!
My girlfriend broke up with me today but it’s ok, She said we can still be cousins.
Words that have ho in them:
Thot Whore Asshole Horrible Horena (my ex gf)
i find this website i see this person named gwen i simp fr her but just for a troll. next thing ik were some how dating? then her ex comes in and dates her again apparently he is gay. and im pretty shure gwen could be a boy but he or she has 3 friends who always back her up, just to let yall know this isnt really supposed be a dating app or drama app its a joke app and this isnt really a joke. but one last thing u guys are all biches…
So 3 guys are walking down the street together and decide to go rob a bank. The first one goes for the richest man in the city’s vault but can’t open it easily, and is caught and sent to death in jail for robbing the richest man. The second one goes for his uncles vault because screw that son of a bh he’s rich why does he need all the money. But his uncle was unfortunately at the vault that day and snapped his nephews neck. The third one went for his ex’s vault and thought “well that bh can suck my dk she’s so poor anyway who would care if I take all her money so she dies of hunger and dehydration and homelessness” so he managed to get into her vault easily because it wasn’t heavily locked and took all her money. The next day the third guys ex showed up to his house and said “imma fg murder you” so she shot him dead and got her money from his house. In hell the three guys see each other and explain what happened. The third guy did and then asked “you know I don’t get it. If the richest guys are heavily guarded but already have so much money in their house why does it need to be heavily guarded? I don’t understand why the poorer aren’t heavily guarded when they are so poor they need the money.” And the first guy said “bh I don’t know maybe the bank tellers think poor people should suck it and just die already”
Can’t anyone relate to this? BEAT WATERSHARKY!!! -Oops!-By- Air Attack Productions and Yung Gravy-Ayy, supercalifragilisticexpiali dope shit Supercalifragi lick my ex be on some ho shit Superman, I get dem bands but ain’t gon’ buy you roses Super-duper get them cougars, took my wrist and froze it Super-duper hoes Y’all got Oompa Loompa hoes I ain’t never knew ya hoes Prolly still ran through 'em, though
Oh, wait, wait, I, I do know your ho? You talkin’ ‘bout, you talkin’ 'bout Tracy? Nah, you mean like, like, Tracy with the ass? Tracy with the, with the Honda? Shit, well
Oops, baby Fuck up on your bitch, like oopsy daisy Never knew that was your boo, baby Hit her five times in the coupe, Mercedes, whoopsie daisy Oops, baby Gravy hit my bitch, yeah, whoopsie daisy I just tryna hit, it’s my duty, baby Sippin’ on the goose, like Boosie, baby Yeah, I said oops, baby Fuck up on your bitch, like oopsy daisy Never knew that was your boo, baby Hit her five times in the coupe, Mercedes, whoopsie daisy Oops, baby Gravy hit my bitch, yeah, whoopsie daisy I just tryna hit, it’s my duty, baby Sippin’ on the goose, like Boosie, baby
Lil’ bitch, I’m happy and I know it so I clap them fuckin’ cheeks, yeah I’m happy and I show it to your momma in the sheets And I’m happy she’s a freak ho, happy so my teeth glow Yeah, my bitch elite, I be clapping every week My neck, my back, got your momma on my sack My checks, my racks, it’s the return of the motherfuckin’ mack And I stay with the pack, though Clap, clap, then I’m out the backdoor Lil’ Pillsbury, I stack dough Walkin’ with a limp, like a crack ho
Yeah, I said oops, baby Fuck up on your bitch, like oopsy daisy Never knew that was your boo, baby Hit her five times in the Coupe, Mercedes, whoopsie daisy Oops, baby Gravy hit my bitch, yeah, whoopsie daisy I just tryna hit, it’s my duty, baby Sippin’ on the goose, like Boosie, baby Yeah, I said oops, baby Fuck up on your bitch, like oopsy daisy Never knew that was your boo, baby Hit her five times in the Coupe, Mercedes, whoopsie daisy Oops, baby Gravy hit my bitch, yeah, whoopsie daisy I just tryna hit, it’s my duty, baby Sippin’ on the goose, like Boosie, baby
A FED EX plane was carrying 375 fridges across Africa but the cargo door wasn’t shut properly but only 218 reached the desired destination. The rest landed in a remote village. How many fell out the plane?
Time’s up! You took too long you only had 4 seconds to answer it.
How do you put an elephant into the fridge that pushed out the cargo door?
Open the fridge, put the elephant in and close the door.
How do you put a giraffe into the fridge?
Open the fridge, take out the elephant. Then put in the giraffe and close the door.
Why did sally fall off the swing?
Because she got hit by the other 156 refrigerators.
How did she survive?
Her idiot mother tried to pull her out and accidentally ripped both her arms off. But she was rescued 8 minutes later.