"Hey, today was great."
"What happened?"
"I ran into my ex today."
"What's so great about that?"
"I was in my car."
What’s the worst part about breaking up with a Japanese person
You have to drop the bomb twice before they get the message
My girlfriend broke up with me because I stole her wheelchair.
But I knew she'd come crawling back to me.
My boyfriend just broke up with me for talking about video games too much. What a stupid thing to Fallout 4.
My girlfriend told me she was leaving me because I keep pretending to be a Transformer. I said, "No, wait! I can change."
Boy: my girlfriend didn't dump me, I dumped her...
Off the nearby cliff
What do you do after your girlfriend with two broken legs dumps you?
Take her wheel chair, she'll come crawling back.
My ex-wife was deaf. She left me for a deaf friend of hers. To be honest, I should have seen the signs.
How did the cow break up with the other cow? He said he moo-ved on
I used to date a girl named Ruth but she broke up with me and now I am ruthless.
my girlfriend dumped me today apparently I don't stand up for her in fights I don't care she use to push me around all the time
When you tell your Roblox girlfriend you’re breaking up with her and then 10 seconds later you hear your uncle crying in the other room.
Me: My gf broke up with me yesterday and I had her wheel chair
Me: guess who came crawling right back
Whenever your ex says, "You'll never find someone like me," the answer to that is, "That's the point."
My gf left me for spending my own money I buy this bitch thousands upon thousands of dollars worth of stuff but I spend 100 dollars on a prostitute she leaves me
I lost my drivers license today i hit my ex with my car
My ex keeps missing me. But her aim is steadily improving....
I broke up with my deaf girlfriend because she never listened to me.
My ex was orphan as a child I should have taken that as the first sign. If her parents didn't want her, why would I.
My girlfriend left me because of my obsession with pasta. -- I'm doing well, but I do get cannelloni.
