Event jokes
9/11
A kid in the back of the class just yelled “Jenga!”
The class was watching a 9/11 documentary.
Children in the Twin Towers be like: "Look, Mum, it's a plane!"
Imagine when you are about to cry at the funeral, then your friend's phone rings.
Then he says, "I'll call you back, I'm still at the die."
Rape, 9/11, abortion, orphan, murder, dead, kill, drugs.
What makes all these categories so familiar? Either you've experienced them, or made them up in your backstory.
I was in a bar in Italy. Me and a hot chick got along, so I asked her for her number. I remembered that there was a pen in my pocket, but when I searched, it was nowhere to be found. I turned back, then I saw Pessi running with it. Shame on you, Pessi, for ruining my night! 😭
This kid yelled "Jenga" when we were watching a 9/11 documentary.
It was an emotional wedding, even the cake was in tiers.
Can people please shut up about "male privileges"? There is no right that men have that women don't.
Women have the right to genital integrity. Women can vote without having to sign up for the draft.
Women have the right to choose parenthood; men do not.
Women have the right to be assumed caregivers for children.
Women have the right to call unwanted, coerced sex rape.
Women have the right to lower jail sentences for the same crime.
Women have the right to not be assumed sexual predators.
Women have the right to government departments that solely serve their interests. They also have the luxury of "women only" events that men cannot even dream of. (They even took the boy scouts away from us.)
Women have the right to government-enforced gender quotas.
Women have the right to exclusive tax benefits for being a business owner.
Women have the right to domestic violence shelters.
Women have the right to not be assumed the primary aggressor in a domestic dispute.
Women have the right to rape a man or boy, and if she gets pregnant from that man/boy, they can sue him for child support.
So it is women who have more rights.
So shut up, feminists, please.
Q: Who are the fastest readers in the world?
A: The 9/11 victims. They went through 20 stories in seconds.
If Joe Biden was on stage and he heard gunshots, he probably would’ve thought it was the ice cream truck.
Where did Sally go during the attack?
Everywhere.
What did a tree do for a human rights day at a tree?
I had no time today after a night with you today, but you walk away.
Person 1: Hey, did you hear about the circus fire?
Person 2: No.
Person 1: It was in-tents.
You know the difference between happy tailgaters and angry tailgaters?
Happy tailgaters know how to throw a party.
A fire broke out at the circus, it was intense.
What is the worst thing about your birthday being on September 11?
Party crashers.
How do NASA plan parades?
They plan-et.
It was 9/10.
You know I would tell you a 9/11 joke, but it just doesn’t hit the spot.