Event jokes

The wedding was so emotional, even the cake was in tiers.

Where did Sally go during the attack?

Everywhere.

What did a tree do for a human rights day at a tree?

I had no time today after a night with you today, but you walk away.

Let's play twin towers, your thighs are the towers and my penis is the plane, coming in between.

What is the worst thing about your birthday being on September 11?

Party crashers.

What do your BF and the Twin Towers have in common?

They both never get erect.

Person 1: Hey, did you hear about the circus fire?

Person 2: No.

Person 1: It was in-tents.

You know the difference between happy tailgaters and angry tailgaters?

Happy tailgaters know how to throw a party.

A fire broke out at the circus, it was intense.

If Joe Biden was on stage and he heard gunshots, he probably would’ve thought it was the ice cream truck.

Who are the fastest readers in the world?

9/11 victims of course, they went through 89 stories in only 5 minutes!

What do 9/11 and COVID-19 have in common?

I couldn't give a fuck about either.

If someone told me to bring up 9/11, they were trying to make a funny joke, but it didn't work.

That one really *crashed and burned*.

There were 500 bricks on a plane. One fell off.

Little Sally was crossing a river full of crocodiles. How did she survive the river? She had a gun. When she got out of the river, she died. Why? Because a brick fell on her head.

The thing about 9/11 and the jokes about it, for most people it flew over their head, for some it flew into their head.

Why was number 10 scared?

It was surrounded by 9/11.

Why can’t anyone sing “hit me with your best shot” at the veterans ball karaoke?

Because every time she sang the line “fire away,” someone started shooting!

[concert] SINGER: How's everyone doin' tonight? CROWD: Woo! ME (from the back in a normal speaking voice): It's actually been a tough few months.

I caught the flowers at a wedding--now married to a hot guy. But then I caught an STD at a funeral, I kinda nervo.........

Why was 10 scared because it was in the middle of 9/11?