Spot jokes
Why can't a cheetah play hide and seek?
Because he's always spotted.
What’s the difference between a G-spot and a golf ball?
A guy will actually search for a golf ball.
Why are women like parking spots?
Because all of the good ones are always taken first, and you gotta wait until they're available again.
Why do tigers have stripes? They don't want to be spotted.
If a dog is white with black spots, then it is 90% great and 10% guilty because it half way starts crimes and is a mistake to the world and is punished by the white dogs that are full white and not mixed colors.
As a kid, I used to eat a sour herb from a certain spot near a rock.
Now I pee on it, just following the ritual of Africa.
Where is the wall's favorite place to meet his friends?
What's white with black spots? A cotton field from above.
The poacher agrees but says that his assistant is ill and will need the man to come with him in his assistant's place. The man agrees, and so the poacher goes out to the jungle with the man.
The poacher brings a pair of handcuffs, a long stick, a shotgun, and a dog. They search through the jungle for about an hour and then spot a male gorilla above in the treetops.
The man asks the poacher what the plan is. The poacher replies, "I'm going to climb the tree and, when I get close enough, I'm going to start poking the gorilla with the stick until it falls out of the tree.
The dog is a specially trained dog. When the gorilla falls out of the tree, the dog will try to bite off the gorilla's balls. When the gorilla moves its hands to protect its balls, you put the handcuffs on it."
This all seems to make sense to the man, but he has one question. "What is the shotgun for?" he asks the poacher. The poacher responds: "If I fall out of the tree before the gorilla, shoot the dog."
MISSING!!
MISSING!!
Name: Ghostiano Penaldo
Missing: 27/6/2021 vs Belgium
Characteristics: Disappearing in big games + Diving + always ranting "give me penalty".
Last found - Practicing tap ins.
Possible Locations: Penalty Spot, Parma, Crotone.
Might be dangerous towards good players.
How do you know someone is fucking dumb?
They put jokes that have been used several times already.
What is a monster's favorite place to swim?
Lake Erie!
Hubble just spotted something huge coming out of Uranus.
Why do cheetahs have spots outside of their bodies?
Because they don't have them on the inside.
Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted.
There's something on your chin, no, the third one down.
Why are cheetahs not good at hiding?
They’re always spotted!
Where do pencils go on holiday? Pencilvania! (Pennsylvania)
My brother said, "Bruh, why you so ugly plus why do you stink?" Me: "Is that supposed to be a roast? I got one for you. Why do you look like you came out the wrong side of your mother? Instead of her stomach, you came out of her butt. That's why you were born with brown spots on your head. That's her poop, you stupid fuckface." My friends: "Ouch that's gotta hurt."
Why do cheetahs have spots? Chicken pox.