Employment jokes

Today sucked. My girlfriend got hit by a car, and I lost my job as an Uber driver.

My boss found my permanent record at the orphanage, and he’s mad. I got fired...

I have said a ton of jokes in my lifetime.

But I got fired from that job.

One time, I worked at the zoo and I was feeding the monkeys.

And one of them μяɨɲąţ€ď on me.

And I went to the hospital and got a bloody nose the next day.

One time, I worked at 3 jobs at the same time and my boss said it was illegal.

It got too out of hand and I got spanked.

💪 💪 🏋️‍♂️ What do you get when you cross a physically disabled gay white male who works out at the gym, who is a bukkake slut, and a physically disabled gay white male who works out at the gym, who is a sex worker?

Cum Junkie.

I lost my job at the bank. Some lady asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her.

I got fired from the M&M Factory because I sorted out the W's.

I got my job at a bank and lost the job the day I got it. A lady asked me to check her balance... so I pushed her!

I have so many jokes about unemployed people, sadly none of them work.

I saw a little kid cry. I went up to him and asked where his parents were. Jeez, I love working at the orphanage!

How did the bullet lose its job? It got fired!

After a week of this, she can't stand it any longer.

The woman goes into her supervisor's office and tells him that she wants to file a sexual harassment suit against the man and explains why.

Treon: I don't care about Vorkie.

Amber: You should, she could be a great person for the company.

Treon: We don't need another one, we got 100 people in here, no need. Now, Amber, please just go make yourself useful.

Amber: Fine!!!!!

Why do women need a pay rise? Isn't the glass ceiling high enough?

The best part of working at an orphanage is you can give them family-size chips.

Mommy, mommy! Do we own a sweatshop?

Shut up and keep sewing!

Why does Zac say he works at McDonald's? Because Aaron go errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

My sister lost two things today:

1: Her virginity.

2: Her job at the zoo.

I got to work.

Ben: Oh no, my boss is here. I hate my job and I'm terrified of my boss.

Ben: Uh, hey, hey Mr. Boss.

Boss: Have a nice day.

Ben: Ok, bye!

Boss:??