What type of phone do orphans have?
Android because they don't have a home button.
Dont Jokes
Why don't orphans go on trips at school?
Parent signature: _______________
What's a rock band that has four men that don't sing?
Mount Rushmore.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Boo.
Boo who?
Awww, don't cry!
POV: When the orphan kid goes to church and they have to swear on something.
The kid: "I swear on my... friends. Oh wait, I don't have any."
Bully: Shut up.
Me: I don't shut up, I grow up, and when I look at you, I throw up.
If there are 12 fish and 6 drown, how many are left?
12, because fish don't drown.
One day, I'm going to Malta to a big hotel. In the morning, I go down to eat breakfast. I tell the waitress I want two pieces of toast. She brings me only one piece. I tell her I want a piece. She says, "Go to the toilet." I say, "You don't understand. I want a piece on my plate." She says, "You better not piss on your plate, you son of a bitch." I don't even know the lady, and she calls me a son of a bitch.
I don't need this shit!!
Later, I go to eat at the big restaurant. The waitress brings me a spoon and a knife, but no fork. I tell her I wanted a fork. She tells me everyone wanna fuck. I say, "You don't understand, I want a fork on my table." She says, "You better not fuck on the table, you son of a bitch." I don't even know the lady, and she calls me a son of a bitch.
I don't need this shit!
So, I go back to my room in a hotel, and there are no sheets on the bed. I call the manager and tell him I want a sheet. He tells me, go to the toilet. I say, "You don't understand, I want a sheet on my bed." He says, "You better not shit on my bed, you son of a bitch."
I go to the checkout, and the man at the desk says, 'Peace on you.' I say, 'Piss on you too, you son of a bitch. I'm going back to Italia. Arrivederci!'
I don't need this shit!
Moral of the story, don't go to Australia with a Korean accent.
Ok, I found this off of an internet meme, this isn't original:
*grabbing kid* Harambe: Ok kid, I don't have much time, but Obama's last name is- *gunshot*
Emos are weird to me because they dress up all black, and you know I don't like that, so that's why I don't like it.
Hi, you guys don't know me, but I have my best interests at heart.
I'm a kind person who wants to put a stop to the bullying. I think that Gwen, Addison Banks, Watersharky, ect. are kind people! Also, I kinda like Watersharky...
Why should you wrap your hamsters in duct tape?
So they don't explode when you f*** them.
What's the difference between a dump truck of dead babies and a Ferrari?
I don't own a Ferrari.
How do you make a hormone?
Don't pay her.
What is the difference when I have my dick in your mouth or when you have yours in mine?
Oh, I forgot, you don't got one, bitches, suck my dick.
Somebody shouts "Fire!"
Man 1: Get the children out!
Man 2: F*** the children!
Man 3: We don't have time!
When people say they get ho's: You don't get no ho's, the only ho's you get is in yo draws.
What's the difference between a goat and a sex slave?
I don't have a slave in my sex dungeon.
Orphan: I love abcdefu!
Caretaker: Why? You don't have anyone to flip off.
Me: I saw an emo kid that got a haircut today. But instead of saying “Like ya cut g” and slapping the neck, I slapped the wrist and said “Like ya cut’s g.”
Emo kid: He said like your bullet holes, G.
Me: I have no bullet holes.
Emo kid: Not yet, you don't.
Me: Ayo what the fuc*.
