Ban

Ban Jokes

Ball

Why was Cinderella banned from playing sports? Because she always ran away from the ball.

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  • Goat

    What do you get when you insert human DNA into a goat? Banned from the petting zoo!

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  • Family

    Why is reverse cowgirl banned in Alabama? Because you should never turn your back on family.

    Trump

    Why can't Trump go to the White House anymore? Because it's forbidden!

    Dad

    My dad has the heart of a lion, and a lifetime ban from the zoo.

    Christmas Tree

    Why are Christmas trees banned in mental hospitals?

    Because the ornaments wouldn't be the only things hanging.

    Mama

    Yo mama so ugly, she got a lifetime ban from KFC for ordering too many burgers.

    Dad

    A young boy walked up to his dad and asked, "Daddy, why are you banned from coming to elementary school?"

    The dad calmly replies, "Because that's how I met your mother."

    Mom

    You know what, I'm done. We are banning "your mom" jokes. They're old, weird, and have been done thousands of times. Just like your mom.

    Japan

    Why does Japan not allow little boys to run?

    Because the last time a little boy came, Japan lost a state.

    Orphanage

    Why am I banned from my Catholic orphanage?

    Because the children kept calling me "daddy."

    Couple

    A young couple gets banned from church.

    There were three couples, one elderly, one middle-aged, and one newlywed, that wanted to join a church. So the minister tells them that in order to be members they must abstain from sex for two whole weeks.

    After two weeks, the minister asks the elderly couple if they had abstained. "Yes, no problem!" So the minister welcomes them to the church.

    Then he asks the middle-aged couple the same question, "Well, after one week, the husband had to sleep on the couch, but we made it!" So the minister welcomes them to the church.

    Then the minister asks the newlywed couple if they had abstained from sex for two weeks.

    "We were unable to abstain. On the third day, my wife dropped a can of corn and when she bent over to pick it up, LUST and PASSION overcame me! I took her right there."

    "I'm sorry," the minister says, "but you are both banned from this church!"

    "We understand," says the husband, "We were banned from the grocery store, too."

    Right

    I got banned from the library because I put the woman's rights book in the fiction section.