Death jokes
Guy: "My life is like a game, I should end it."
Guy 2: "Is it a hard life?"
Guy: "Yup"
Guy 2: "Then you can't kill yourself LOL"
Guy 3: "Hold on, I know a cheat code to finish the 'game'"
Once again, RIP Daniel Kyre, he actually died this day five years ago.
He attempted suicide Sep 16, and was in life support, till his parents made the tough decision of taking him off.
We will miss ya bud..... (cyndagoooooooo)
Blue: The ocean is a place where the creatures live.
Black: NIGHTMARES LIVE!
Blue: It has many pretty things and it will-
Black: KILL YA TO DEATH! Especially if you are on Titanic! So let that sink in. PUN INTENDED!
Why do emos like circles? Because they can hang out with them.
What was the first thing Thanos snapped?
Loki’s neck.
A husband and wife are crossing the street. The husband is explaining to the wife why you should always look both ways before crossing the street.
Man: "So you see, Dolly? You should always look both ways before crossing the street."
The man turns and looks to his wife, but she is not there!
Man: "Dolly? Dolly!"
The man looks around and sees Dolly laying dead on the street.
Man: "Dolly!"
hehehe
Why did lil Timmy drop his lollies?
He was hit by a train.
"If all of these structures break we will all die."
And I said, "Hey, that is not supportive!"
And he said, "It would be breaking news."
Why can't Michael Jackson go within 500m of a school zone?
Because he's dead.
If you drop an emo and a piece of paper out of a tree, you know what will hit the floor first? The paper, because the rope will stop the emo.
What’s the difference between Jesus and the toddler in my basement?
Jesus died a virgin.
If I die, delete my search history.
What's worse than a pile of dead babies?
One at the bottom that's still alive.
What's worse than that?
It's forced to eat its way out.
What's even worse than that?
It comes back for seconds.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
Because I unplugged his life support to charge my phone.
A child with cancer says, "Mother, what will I be when I grow up?"
Then the mother says, "Shut up, dick, you have cancer!" Hehehe.
What did they do with Michael Jackson when he died?
They melted him down and turned him into Lego, so kids could play with him for once.
My dad died in 9/11. I'll always remember his last words:
Allah hu akbar.
A guy sits at a bar in a skyscraper restaurant high above the city. He slams a shot of tequila, goes over to the window, and jumps out.
What's the difference between a dead baby and a sandwich? I don't put my dick in a sandwich before I eat it.
There once was a commie called Ed. Usually known as Ned. He went to bed, Got shot in the head, Unfortunately now he was dead.
Why do Orphans sleep in a double bed?
Because their parents can't!