One night, I saw a woman sitting behind a dumpster. So I took her home. We talked all the way there. When we got home, I gave her a bath. Later on, things started getting passionate. We started doing intercourse, and some of the noises she made you would have thought she was still alive!
Death Jokes
An orphan walks on a path asking for his mum. Soon he remembers he doesn't have a mum.
(Also, I had sex with ur mum. She was screaming "daddy~")
Why are skeletons so calm?
Why did the chicken cross the road because he wanted to get run over and poop, and he died for 30 years until he was sent to Joe for getting run over, and he got killed by something, and then he died, and then he got it by you poop.
I’ll never forget my father’s last words...
Oh fuck, it’s a bus!
What’s green and orange and sits at the bottom of the swimming pool?
A baby with burst armbands.
I will never forget my grandfather's last words: “The fuck you doing with that knife?”
My dad drove past a graveyard. He said, "I won't be buried there." I asked why.
He said, "Because I am not dead yet!"
Why did Princess Diana cross the road? - 'Cause she wasn't wearing a seatbelt.
My jokes are pretty "bone-arifick," if I say so myself. Hehhehe... Get it?
What did the people do to the deceased after tests?
They bari-um.
What did the rope say to me?
"Hey there man, you wanna hang later?"
Everybody misses Xxxtentacion, but the bullet didn't...
The skeleton cancelled the gallery showing of his skull-ptures because his heart just wasn’t in it.
I was gonna tell a dead baby joke, but I decided to abort.
The other day while I was going down on my grandma, I thought I tasted a little horse semen and I got to wondering if maybe that’s what killed her!
If your wife dies of childbirth, can you press charges on the baby?
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
Make him clap until his parents come back.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall red?
It depends on how hard you throw them. 😈😈
What’s one thing you can say at a funeral and during sex?
She was too young.
