Killer jokes
Dude,
if you stab a cereal box, will that make you a cereal killer?
The cops are still searching for my wife's killer. Luckily, I already fled the country.
I've been looking for my ex-girlfriend's killer for the past two years.
But no one would do it.
What does a serial killer make for breakfast?
Scrambled legs and toes.
Why can't depressed kids high five a tree? It will leave them hanging.
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they can't find home!
A serial killer was at my house and killed all my family but me. Why? I was in the living room.
What do sloths and depressed people have in common? They both hang off trees.
What is a group of depressed kids called? The suicide squad.
Just.
Old.
Killer.
Epigrams.
Where does the killer whale go to get its teeth done?
The orca Don-tist.
New horror movie idea. The main character loves anime. The killer yells "Omae wa mou shindeiru." The main character instinctively yells back "NANI???" and is killed.
In the morning, I become a cereal killer.
I just stepped on a corn flake. I'm officially a cereal killer.
"BlessedBrian must be a SMOKE DETECTOR... because he never fails to kill the vibe."
Nobody:
JFK: :) Hi guys!
JFK's killer: Ayo look at this shit, I just hit a clip.
I killed my cat.
If you kill a killer, the same amount of killers in the room stays the same.
Wow, these jokes are lit.
Some might say even killer!
Whoever kills Hitler goes to heaven.
Oh, wait... never mind...
I stepped on a cornflake. They accused me of being a serial killer.
Ted Bundy walks into a bar wearing all black. The bartender asks, “Whose funeral is it?”
Ted Bundy looks around the room and replies, “I haven’t decided yet.”
There were three men in a car: the driver, a homeless man, and a rapper. The driver takes them to the woods and says, "I'm not really a cab driver, I'm a wanted killer." The homeless man says, "I'm not really homeless," and pulls out a chain. The rapper says, "If we're gonna be completely honest, I'm not a rapper, I'm a cop!"
What a day yesterday was! I got a promotion, and my sister's killer was hit by a bus. Now I'm in a cast!