Dark Humor
How many dead children does it take to change the light in a basement?
More than ten, apparently.
Dark humour : hell!!! Aren't people racist!!!
Emo kids counting be like: 1, 2, 3 come hang with me! 4, 5, 6 Gonna get new slits! 7, 8, 9 Suicide! 10, 11, 12 Bring some pills!
I was walking today and I saw an emo with a noose looking up at a tree. I simply said, "Hang on there, bud!"
Crying babies are like parties. No matter how many times you try to end it, it keeps going.
What is the most noise that comes out of a ladies mouth? Nothing because they never have anything important to say.
I was going to tell a dead baby joke, but I decided to abort it.
What were the balloon's last words to his Father?
"Watch me, Pop!"
Dog toys are getting out of control.
My mum's dog has a round bison bone.
Looks like he was chewing on Tracy Latimer's hip or something.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Suicide.
Suicide who?
Suicide you.
What do JFK’s killer and a prostitute have in common?
“They both blow heads.”
Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.
Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.
What first went through Sally's head when the Nazis came? A bullet.
Where did Sally go when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.
What did Sally get for Christmas? A bike.
I have a friend who's a suicide bomber. He's a blast at parties.
What's the best part about having sex with 28 year olds? There are 20 of them.
Person 1: You are the dumbest person in the class.
Person 2: Well, you're the second. Maybe, but at least I'm not the dumbest.
Person 2: I know how to fix that!
... Next day person commits suicide...
Here’s another joke my friend told me.
What did the school shooter do when the librarian told him to be quiet? Pulled out a silencer.
I told someone some jokes, y'know? "Fruit Ninja," "barcode legs," "French puppet thigh wrings." And she was like saying that's not cool and stuff. So she reported me, and it was like:
The counselor: "So I've heard you've been making sh jokes?" Me: "You say it like it's a bad thing." Her: "It is." Me: "Chill bro, it ain't that deep. Don't worry I'll end it :)"
Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere!
What's worse than Sally in a trash can? Sally in thirteen trash cans.
What is the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Porsche in my garage.
I joined an emo class today. The first lesson I learned was slice and dice and let it flow.