Dark Humor

What is Bill Cosby's favorite poem? Roses are red, my cum is blue, I'll wait till your asleep to rape you.

We all hear cause we cut ourselves, right? I mean, JK.

Why is America bad at playing Clash of Clans?

Because they already lost two towers.

My girlfriend's a two, but she's turning three tomorrow.

A man asks God, "Hello God, why did you make my wife so dumb?"

God replies, "So she would love you..."

Once upon a time, there was a man named Daniel. He was blind and deaf, and he worked at a morgue.

So, one time poor Dan got confused and started having sex with the rotting corpse.

He then came home and thought he was at the morgue, so he started disintegrating his sleeping wife.

I got my daughter a trampoline for her birthday. The ungrateful bitch just sat there in her wheelchair and cried.

Q: Why was the 4 year old anti-vaxer crying?

A: He was in a mid-life crisis.

Person 1: Stop making suicidal jokes!

Person 2: Okay, okay, I’ll cut it out.

Person 1: Really?

Person 2: They're not even that deep.

What is the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

My only friend who actually cares: "Stop making suicide jokes, I’m really concerned!"

Me: Okay, I’ll cut it out.

Humor is like skin; the darker it gets, the less people like it.

What did Michael say to the boy in his room at sleepovers?

"You are not alone."

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a refrigerator?

A refrigerator doesn't toot when you put meat in it.

Become an anti-furry for free KFC and dead orphans in your basement.

Why do rapists and pedophiles never win a race?

Because they always like to come in a little behind.

Are you a grave, 'cause I want you on me?

What's the difference between anal rape and a microwave?

A microwave won't brown your meat.

How does Osama feed his child? "Here comes the airplane, here comes another one."

Noose: "Hey man, wanna hang out?"

Corpse: "Sorry man, I'm dead inside."

Joke: Genders are much like the twin towers. They used to be two, but now it's a sensitive subject.