Dad jokes
An orphan saw a tornado, and he thought he saw his mom, but then he realized it was a corpse and said, "Hi, Dad!"
Why did my dad leave me and my mum?
I told him it wasn't big enough and then ran off saying, "Daddy, yeeeees!"
I saw your forehead and realized your mom and dad's foreheads were as big as yours. Also, you're gay.
Hey, my sister said you're Mattick, so I decided to swim with her and she threw a ball at me, so I went to my dad and she said, "Why did you tell dad?" She was crying because I’m not getting a car seat.
My dad was in 9/11, that's rude, and he was a great pilot.
Tell an orphan "your mom", but then remember he doesn't have one.
Yo life got no meaning, just like your dad when he left. Like if it's a good one.
Daughter: Hey Dad, can I use your car?
Dad: Sure, but first you have to give me a blow job."
Daughter: Okay, (proceeds to service dad). Dad, ewww, your dick tastes like shite!"
Dad: Oh, that's right, I lent your brother the car.
Yo momma so dumb, when your dad said it was chilly outside, she ran outside with a spoon.
People joking about 9/11.
Random kid: "You shouldn’t joke about that! I lost my dad on 9/11."
Oh.
"Yeah, he was the greatest pilot ever!"
Why do orphans hate any milk?
Their dad did not come back for 10 years. Oh, sorry, he got lost in the store! 🤧
I don't joke about 9/11 because I lost my dad. He was the best pilot I ever knew.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not your dad.
What does your dad's cock and Darryl's Savouries have in common?
I want them both in my mouth!
Your dad has a huge PP.
Why is being an electrician the easiest job in the world? It's literally light work.
Why did Dad Man quit acting?
I don’t know either.
One day I seen a little boy walking in the grocery store, so I asked if he was okay, and he said yes. I asked where his parents were, and he said his mom died years ago and his dad is stuck in the milk aisle.
Doctor: I will deliver the baby right away.
Dad: I would like the baby to have a liver.
Why does Aaron chug beer on a Wednesday?
Because his dad beats him every single day because he has scoliosis.