Dad jokes

There are 2 dads and 2 sons. They all caught a fish.

Why did they only come home with 3 fish?

(Answer)

There were a grand-dad, dad, and son.

If you don't get it, then it means grand father is the dad to the dad (1 dad). Dad is the dad for the son and a son for the grandfather. Get it?

Where did your dad go? Because I saw him at the milk shop. Oh wait, there isn't one.

You better get used to having dry cereal cuz your dad ain't never bringing the milk back.

What were the orphan's mom and dad's names? John and Jane Doe.

Knock, knock.

"Who's there?"

Not your dad.

Your dad is so smart, he took one look at you and left.

I finally asked my deadbeat dad what makes him happy. His answer? He hasn't gotten back to me.

Life is better without my dad annoying me (him smacking me, screaming for something useless, limiting my screen time, and much more).

What’s worse than banging your sister?

Having to wear your dad’s wedding ring.

The kid's dad was a magician because he disappeared and never came back.

What is the difference between the pizza guy and my dad?

The pizza guy shows up when you call him.

I asked my dad to come to my Father’s Day breakfast.

The orphanage worker just said, “Don’t be silly!”

My dad is like a unicorn.

He's never here. :c

I love ❤️ dogs.

What's one thing your dad shares with black men? Your sister.

"Dad, did you get a haircut?"

"No, I got them all cut!"

Wife: Honey, I’m pregnant. Husband: Hi Pregnant, I’m dad. Wife: No, you’re not.

My dad came out of my step-sister's room as I came out of my step-mum's room.

White people can't say the N-word, but at least they can say, "Thanks for the warning, officer," and "Hi, Dad."

Mom: Don't forget to unload the dishwasher.

Mom: Did you finish your homework?

Mom: We are going to your grandmother's house for Thanksgiving.

Mom: Dad and I talked. We are getting a new car next month.

Son: You are?? Oh my gosh, thank you!

Mom: No, I was just making sure you were getting my texts.

Son: That was cruel!