Dad jokes

Why does Aaron chug beer on a Wednesday?

Because his dad beats him every single day because he has scoliosis.

Have y'all ever heard of dad jokes? Y'all hairline is funnier than those.

Doctor: I will deliver the baby right away.

Dad: I would like the baby to have a liver.

What does your dad's cock and Darryl's Savouries have in common?

I want them both in my mouth!

Why did Dad Man quit acting?

I don’t know either.

Why do orphans hate any milk?

Their dad did not come back for 10 years. Oh, sorry, he got lost in the store! 🤧

So, I was in school, and there was a number saying "696969," so I said to my mother, "What does it mean?" She said, "Your fucking dad and I!"

What's the difference between you, your uncle, and your dad?

One didn't go in the closet.

Friend: My mum took my phone from me, and I really want it back.

Me: Yeah, well, Hades took my parents from me, and the funny thing is, I don't want them back.

Where did your dad go? Because I saw him at the milk shop. Oh wait, there isn't one.

There are 2 dads and 2 sons. They all caught a fish.

Why did they only come home with 3 fish?

(Answer)

There were a grand-dad, dad, and son.

If you don't get it, then it means grand father is the dad to the dad (1 dad). Dad is the dad for the son and a son for the grandfather. Get it?

Kid: Dad, where do you work?

Dad: I.C.U.P.

Kid: HAHAHAH!!!! See you pee.

You better get used to having dry cereal cuz your dad ain't never bringing the milk back.

What were the orphan's mom and dad's names? John and Jane Doe.

My dad is like a unicorn.

He's never here. :c

I love ❤️ dogs.

Life is better without my dad annoying me (him smacking me, screaming for something useless, limiting my screen time, and much more).

Knock, knock.

"Who's there?"

Not your dad.

Your dad is so smart, he took one look at you and left.

What is the difference between the pizza guy and my dad?

The pizza guy shows up when you call him.