Kid: Dad, what's a dark joke?
Dad: Well, you see that guy over there? Tell him to wave.
Kid: But Dad, I'm blind.
Dad: Exactly, also the dude had no arm.
My dad died in the attacks. He was the best pilot for Pakistan.
Ur dad is gay!
Omg! I didn't mean that. Please don't tell ur mom.
I'm so so so sry!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
A dad and his son walk out to the middle of the woods armed only with a shovel and a lantern.
Son: "Dad, it's creepy out here!"
Dad: "You're complaining? I'm the one that has to leave the woods alone!"
What do you say to the orphan Shut up get a mom and dad
Yo dad is like a boomerang;he never comes back.
Dad: Hey son, do you like Christmas?
12 year old me: Yeah!
Dad: Well, how would you feel about two?
Me: What?
Son: Hey dad, why is my name Canada?
Dad: Because you were made there.
Mum: We haven't been to Canada.
Dad: Hol' up a minute.
I asked my dad what his previous job was. He said: "I was a post until I met your mother."
What do Gay Men and Minorities have in common?
My dad hates them both!
Thanks for the birthday wishes. It's been an odd one this year, as some of you know, my father suddenly passed away on my birthday last year, and anyone who knew the old man knew he had a sledgehammer wit!
Good on ya dad, ya definitely got the last laugh!
Why doesn’t my bully get a dad joke? Oh, ya, ummm...
What kind of fish knows how to do an appendectomy? A sturgeon!
Is there anything worse than when it's raining cats and dogs? Yes, hailing taxis.
How do you hire a horse? Easy. Just put up a ladder.
Why did my dad bring a bomb vest to fit in with his Taliban brothers?
My dad was in the plane in 9/11, and he was the smart one that convinced everyone. He said, "We're fucked."
Dad: What did your older brother say before he lost his virginity?
Son: Dad, please don't.
Dad: Exactly.
When I was born, I saw you at the adoption center alone.
That day your dad got milk. 😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬
Your hairline is as nonexistent as your dad.
