Crime jokes
POV: An Asian kidnapper kidnapped an Asian kid, and the kidnapper called the kid's mom. Then the mom said, "No, it's fine, my kid got a B, he failed." And the kidnapper let him go saying he doesn't need a failure.
Male Patient: So, I just pull my pants down and bend over for this prostate exam?
Doctor: Yep.
Male Patient: Ok, I'm ready. Hey! That doesn't feel like a finger.
Doctor: Yep, and I'm not even a doctor.
Luca’s Mom and Dad be throwing the kids into the fountain in the city, but they're sea monsters, so if they went to jail for that, they would be on death row anyway. 🤣
Why is Hitler a better person than Jeffrey Epstein?
At least Hitler killed himself.
Lil Johnny looked a lil bonny, but then when he saw Tommy, he decided to bomb me.
Do you know why pedos get away with molesting orphans? Who are they gonna tell? Not their parents.
Say what you want about Jeffery Dahmer, but he always managed to get a head.
What’s the relationship between a pedophile and a light bulb? They're both meant for dark rooms.
"Terrorist, that’s a little strong. We call them private militaries."
What do you call a psychic midget in trouble with the law?
A small medium at large.
A panda walks into a restaurant, orders some food, and eats it. Once he was done, he shoots the waiter, then leaves.
Police and detectives arrive at the scene. They ask the waiter, "Who did this to you? What happened?"
The waiter replies, "A panda, eats, shoots, and leaves."
Shout out to the terrorists, your year is starting off with a bang!
What's the difference between when I opened the window in a car wash and when Kawhi Leonard did it? At least my dad didn't get shot in the eye.
What do you call a protest that gets crowded?
Human trafficking.
People say that they miss xxxtentacion, like the bullet didn’t.
Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a registered six offender.
It's impossible to rape a rapeist because rapeists want sex.
Why couldn’t the booty stay calm?
Because it was on crack.
Your soul is black. I have 4 guns, little kid. Get in the van before I shoot you!
"Whole November month, sniper lessons available in Dallas U.S.?"