Crime jokes

Why did the Mafia cross the road?

Forget about it...

I killed a Wood elf yesterday. The guard charged me with... mer-der.

Why did the terrorist masturbate and smoke weed on the plane?

He was told to high-jack it.

You hear about Rapboats' time in prison? He kept droppin' the soap on purpose.

The only thing shittier than rapeboats rhymes are his jokes.

When's the only time a rapeboat is quiet? When he got his uncle's cock in his mouth.

Why does rapboat like underage girls? Cos grown ass girls are too clever for him.

There was a kid in a wheelchair. I put him on fire and called him Hot Wheels.

Why did the terrorists crash?

They were doing the job they loved but not getting paid.

Lol.

Therapists are rapists in disguise, because "the rapist".

How many gangsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

35! Do you have a problem with that?

I have a body count of 7.

My wife slept with another man and got pregnant. She told me 9 weeks later. I said it's ok and told her let's talk downstairs, so I pushed her down the stairs.

Jorden Calerendiá.

I bet you are a child molester who got out of jail and is now sexually harassing kids such as Addison! Will fuck off and get a life, by the way your roasts are not fucking funny they are bullshit like your face and your hairline.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Answer:

The man said, "He's going to rape the people on the side of the road."

Okay class, who can tell me who the fastest readers are?

The pilots of 9/11 went through the Twin Towers, 6 in 3 seconds.

I put a pipe bomb in an orphanage. 🤡🤡

What do Batman and a Black man have in common?

Answer: They can't go anywhere without Robin.

I'm an orphan, so kidnap me.

After the school shooting, Joe pretended to be a victim while his sister ate the flesh of the fallen.