Crime jokes
Why did the boy shoot the clock?
What's the difference between 13 dead babies and a skeleton?
There aren't any, there's 13 skeletons in my closet.
Me: Hi Jaiden.
Bully/Jaiden Harper: Leave me alone, weirdo.
Me: Wow, says the one who didn't pass 3rd grade.
Bully/Jaiden Harper: *hits*
Me: *calls FBI and puts on gloves and stabs random person then gives knife to Jaiden and takes off gloves* Bye bye.
FBI: FBI OPEN UP!!!!!!!!!
A drunk guy runs into a bar... He bangs his head and falls down, why?
Because he is in a prison cell.
Who remembers when ‘tweeting’ meant “stabbing a hooker”?
Paedophiles are f***ing immature assholes.
I’m here to collect my bounty, what’s your bounty? Your pants.
How many babies does it take to paint a room red?
Depends how hard you throw 'em.
@shelby denver is a massive nonce.
What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison?
A small medium at large!
If a WOMAN gets RAPED, RUN INTO THE SECNE AND HELP HER.
What do you call an orphan with a gun?
(No) home shooter.
Trump's releasing the files.
To catch all the pedophiles.
He didn't know Epstein.
Didn't touch any teens.
If you think Tracy Latimer's murder was in any way justified, put on your helmet 'cause you're about to miss the short bus.
Statistics show 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape.
It's a little known fact that Helen Keller was against teaching deaf people sign language and thought they should be forced to use oral language.
Weird.
Last time I forced somebody into oral, I got arrested.
Person: So, Jimmy, what do you do all day?
Jimmy Savile: Anyone who I can do.
What do Somalians excel at in the United States?
Welfare fraud.
Why is Kyle Rittenhouse the Ultimate Crime Fighter?
Because in one night he killed a pedophile and a domestic abuser.
Q. What do iPads and Jeffrey Epstein have in common?
A. Kids turn them on.