Country jokes
Which country of the world has the poorest/most hungry people?
Answer: Hungary
How many Americans does it take to fill the Grand Canyon?
4
Do the French people smoke weed or oui'd?
Gays: I like men.
Straights: I like women.
Russia: Hole is hole.
Yo mama is so small that when she saw the Titanic, she called it the size of the Netherlands.
Hell hates freezers, England, and soccer.
What do you call a guy with a long chin?
Chino-Chinese
We are going to a country called Bangkok. When we are there, we will Bangkok.
People were deciding how to punish a terrible criminal, and one man came up with a great idea.
He sat him in a movie theater with no food at all and made him watch a 12 hour documentary about the country Hungary.
Person A: Where do you come from?
Person B: Liberia.
Person A: *speaks softer* Oh sorry, do you come from?
This city slicker broke down on a country road. He looked around, and in the distance, he spotted a farm house. When he finally got there, he asked the farmer if he had a phone he could use because his had no reception.
The farmer told him he could use it if he married his daughter. The guy said he really didn’t wanna get married, and the farmer said, "If you marry my daughter, I’ll give you half my farm..." The guy said, "Lemme see her..." The farmer hollered, “Hey you, get over here...” and she said, “Duh, ok.” The ol' boy looked at her and said, "Nooo thank you."
The father said, “I’ll give you all my farm and my bank account if you’ll marry my daughter....” The ol' boy thought for a minute and said, “Well I guess I can put a sack over her head.” So they married and the farmer kept his word and gave him everything.
One day the guy was up fixin' the roof and hollered, “Hey you, get me some nails...” His wife said, “Duh, nails, nails?” He said, “Yes, nails,” and showed her one. She said, “Oh, duh, nails, nails.” He said, “Yes, nails.” So she got him some. He was hammering away when he hit his thumb, and he yells, “Oh F*** it!” and she turned and hollered, “Duh, a sack, a sack, duh, a sack!”
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Jets versus towers, USA lost two.
Top 10 Cos:
1. Disco 2. Flamenco 3. Fresco 4. Fiasco 5. Monaco 6. Tobacco 7. Bronco 8. Morocco 9. UNESCO 10. Taco
Pexico? Not top 1000 in my honest book.
Don't bother; just try to live in England.
Smoking a fag in the UK means to smoke a cigarette.
Smoking a fag in the USA means to kill a homosexual.
What's the main similarity between an elementary school math class and the USA?
The class divides.
Yo, if Russia comes to the USA, just know their reboot cards don't expire.
What is a Mexican's favorite type of dog?
A Chihuahua.
Why do toy bears have small eyes? Because they were made in China.
Q: Why aren't there any Walmarts in Afghanistan?
A: Because there's a Target on every corner.