Country jokes
Hello, America!
So, if Russia was the motherland and Germany was the fatherland, what does that mean?
The Western Front is domestic violence.
What is your favorite color?
- What do you call a bee who flew to United States? - "USB"
Maishah, the poo comes from an old bathroom in a country starting with B.
People say that Pakistan is a terrorist nation...
Guys, it's not true, even Osama bin Laden lived there peacefully for 6 years.
What's white, red, blue, and brown all over?
The American flag I used to wipe my ass with.
French fries don't come from France; they come from Greece.
I'm American, and I'm sick of people saying America is "the stupidest country in the world." Personally, I think Europe is the stupidest country in the world.
When Canadians get hurt, they don't go "ouch," they go "ooch!"
Little Johnny was walking down a dirt country road, and he came upon an old farmer leaning against a fence looking sad, shaking his head. He walked up to the old farmer and asked him what's wrong. The old farmer said, "My mule, he just won't do nothing. He don't work anymore, always looking sad, barely eats, just sad." Little Johnny said, "Can I go talk to him?" "Sure," the old farmer said, "he's back in the barn." Little Johnny went back in the barn, saw the mule just sad, and sighing. A few minutes later, Little Johnny came out and said, "Your mule is fixed." The old farmer ran in, and saw the mule laughing, just rolling, and crying laughing. "Thank you, thank you," the old farmer said, and Little Johnny was on his way. Well, a few days later, Little Johnny was walking down the same old dirt road, and came upon the old farmer again, looking sad. "What's the matter?" Little Johnny asked. "It's my mule again. Ever since you talked to him, he won't do nothing, he won't work, just laughing all day. What did you say?" "Can I go in and talk to him again?" Little Johnny asked. "Sure," said the old farmer, "he's back in the barn." Little Johnny went in the barn and a few minutes later came back out. "Your mule is fixed, sir." The old farmer went in and saw the mule crying, crying really hard. The old farmer came running out of the barn, "Hey boy! What did you say to my mule? One day he's sad, then laughing, now he's crying. Just what did you say to my mule?" Little Johnny smiled and answered, "Well, the first time I told him my dick was bigger than his; this time I showed it to him."
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Hitler blew an 11 country lead, During World War 2.
Did you know that French fries aren't from France? They're cooked in Greece.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't find home.
Someone at school asked what makeup I was wearing.
I said, "a smile."
They are now following me around asking if my mental health is okay.
My plan to avoid them is to not go to school.
Going to school is mandatory in this country.
Can you guess my plan?
What is the American virus? Diabetes.
Yo forehead is so big it couldn't even fit in the United States.
What's the difference between an American and a computer?
Americans don't have trouble shooting!
Why don't gay men have anal sex in Greece? because anal sex between gay men is against the law.
The population in Ireland's capital started rapidly growing. In fact, it's Dublin!