Conversation jokes

Me: I saw an emo kid that got a haircut today. But instead of saying “Like ya cut g” and slapping the neck, I slapped the wrist and said “Like ya cut’s g.”

Emo kid: He said like your bullet holes, G.

Me: I have no bullet holes.

Emo kid: Not yet, you don't.

Me: Ayo what the fuc*.

Ashley said to me one day, "What is my name?"

And I said, "My name is everyday life of stupidity."

So, two people are on a date and the guy says, "Wow, you are so beautiful!"

Then the girl says, "You just want to have sex!"

Then the guy adds, "SMART TO!"

Let's talk.

"Hey Kenya, can we talk please!"

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Banana.

Banana who?

Orange.

Orange who?

Orange you glad I didn't say banana again?

What did the window say to the door?

"What are you squeaking about? I'm the one with the panes!"

Get it?

My mom told me that my friend Paul is coming over, and he is going to sleep over, so I was happy.

The next day, I ask my mom, "Where's the dog?" My mom asks me, "What dog?"

Then I said to my mom, "I heard Paul say, 'Do you want it doggy?' and you said 'Yeah.'"

There were two friends talking one day. Tim tells John, "I think I'm gay."

John says to Tim, "What do you mean?"

Tim says, "When I grow up, I want to dress like a woman and sing karaoke in a bar and call myself (Gillette the best a man can get)!"

John says to Tim, "I think you're right, and thanks for reminding me I need to buy razors."

When recycling toilet paper, you really need to process the crap out of it.

Conversely, you can recycle a condom quite easily: just turn it inside out and shake the fuck out of it.

Girl: "Dad."

Dad: "Do I love you?"

Girl: "I am a prostitute."

Dad: "Yes."

Woman 2: "Dad."

Dad: "Right?"

Woman 2: "I'm a woman too."

Father: "God, do you love children?"

Boy: "Yes..."

Knock knock. Who’s there? We ask the questions!!!!!!!!

I've had conversations with many people. Some of them were drier than my dad's ashes.

Person A: Hey, what's the next subject?

Person B: Let me check.

Person B: It's greenglish!

What did the peanut say to the cashew after their argument?

I'mma cashew outside!

The umpire and the catcher were having a conversation. The runner slid into home, “I slid into this conversation.”

Hey, do you wanna hear a joke?

No, I'm already looking at one.

When we talk of our X, some people talk of their XXX. 🤣

What does a nun say when you ask too many questions?

"Nunya business!"

Friend: Hi.

Me: Do you know how lost their dad is?

Friend: Me?

Me: Damn, no, not you.

Friend: Then who?

Me: The orphan kid.

I guess we're the same.