Conversation jokes

Haircut

I asked my friend, "Hey, did you get a haircut?" and she said, "No." Then I'm like, "Really? Then why are you bald today?"

Subject

Person A: Hey, what's the next subject?

Person B: Let me check.

Person B: It's greenglish!

Friend

My friend was getting bullied so I went over and asked him to stop. It went a little bit like this:

Me: Dude, leave her alone. Him: Beat it, b*tch. *lots of arguing and swearing* Me: Ya know! The smartest thing that ever came outta your mouth was probably a penis. Him: *walks away*

Man

Two men are sitting at a coffee table.

Mike: "I think I might have a drinking problem."

Joe: "Why do you say that?"

Mike: "Well, last week I got so drunk I blew chunks."

Joe: "That's nothing to be ashamed of; we all drink a little too much sometimes."

Mike: "No, you don't understand. Chunks is my dog's name."

People

Okay, I love reading Freshfry's conversations with random people. I love the ones where he has a full blown talking battle. I personally like reading them and I love reading them on my Chromebook while I play Call of Duty and Fortnite on my Xbox.

If you guys out there like reading Freshfry's conversations with random people, just comment and tell me. Talk to you guys later, watersharky out.

Memes

Guy

There was this guy going to a bar. The guy asks for a drink. The bartender says, "I'll give you a drink if you can tell me a meta-joke."

So the guy replies,

OK. There was this guy going to a bar. The guy asks for a drink. The bartender says, "I'll give you a drink if you can tell me a meta-joke."

So the guy replies,

OK. There was this guy going to a bar. The guy asks for a drink. The bartender replies, "Here you go!"

So he gives the guy a drink. So he gives the guy a drink. So he gives the guy a drink.

Feminist

Me: Knock knock.

Friend: Who's there?

Me: Impatient feminist.

Friend: Impati--

Me: Why don't we have equal pay YETTTTTTT?

9/11

Why do people always talk about 9/11, but seriously, just let it sit there, like the rubble it is.

Reincarnation

This morning, I was having a conversation with my ex-boyfriend about reincarnation. I said to him, "If you could come back in the next life as anything, what would you come back as?" He thought about it for a minute and says, "A tree. That way, everybody can look at me and admire me."

Then he says the same thing to me. I started thinking about it when these two sexy, half-naked studs walked by. One was a jock, the other on his bicycle. I know I said I want to come back as a jockstrap or a bicycle seat, but knowing my luck, I'll come back as a tampon.

John Cena

Asian conversation:

Person 1: Ni hao, how's it going?

Person 2: Konnichiwa, what's up?

Person 1: I've bing chilling.

Butt

How do butts start a conversation?

"Let's cut to the chase!"

Knock

Villager: KNOCK KNOCK

Steve: Who's there?

Villager: I'm not talking anymore.

Steve: I'm not talking anymore who?

Orphan

Peter: *curses*

Sam: Wow, do you kiss your mom with that mouth?

Peter: Jokes on you, I don't have a mom.

Tony: *having a heart attack* AFSJDHFKJJD Peter, we talked about this!!!

Knock

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Orange.

Orange who?

Orange you glad I didn't make a 9/11 joke?

Cat

Q: If a cat says to a dog, "All dogs are liars," and the dog says to the cat, "All cats are liars," what does it mean?

A: It means cats and dogs can talk.

Guy

When the guy asks the girl if she's wet, she replies, "Yeah, milky knickers!"

Airplane

Q) What did the airplane say to the little boy?

A) Nothing, airplanes don't talk!

Object

Me and bro talking about direct objects at 1 a.m. because we don’t know English.