Can jokes
An Irish man walks out of a bar. It can happen.
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they can't find home.
If you are a robot, you cannot talk.
Mom: You can't die in the living room, David, so you can stop stabbing and shooting yourself.
David: I will surpass Kakarot!
Jordan: *dead on the living room floor*
Why can you trust a donut? It tells the hole truth!
Roses are red, That's a tin can, You have no home, So get in the van!
What is the difference between a human and a tree? A human being is the one who can drive.
Roses are red, Epstein's face turned blue.
Trump's on that list, And there's nothing he can do.
What’s one thing a man can do that a woman can’t?
Sit down and shut up.
When fat people sit down at a restaurant, you can hear the chair screaming.
What two fights can Africa never win?
A food fight and a water fight.
If you can make a woman laugh, you're almost there.
If you're almost there and then she laughs, then you've got a whole different problem on your hands.
Why do Mexicans wear pointed boots?
So they can climb a fence easier.
Jake: Can I go outside?
Mom: Did you clean your room?
Jake: No.
Mom: Then f*ck no.
Jake: Alright, bet.
(Brother named No)
What is the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus? You can hang the picture with just one nail.
Why can lesbians not drive cars?
They always strap the wrong thing on.
You can find perfectly cooked Kobe in a Japanese restaurant, but you can only find burnt Kobe in Calabasas.
I'm surprised BLESSEDBRIAN can fit through the door, considering how INFLATED his ego is.
What do you call a booty that can sing?
A crack-up!
A fat homeless person begged me for food, so I said, "I can see your dinner. You had plenty!"