Can jokes
How can you tell if your wife is dead? -- The sex is the same, but the dishes start piling up.
Why did the orphan like to jump? So they can jump off a bridge to be reunited with their parents.
1 like = 10 more orphans in my basement.
What's an orphan's least favorite show? Family Guy ;)
It’s not like they can watch it anyway: it’s PG.
An orphan finds a genie.
Orphan: "My first wish is to be rich."
Genie: "Of course."
Orphan: "My second wish is to be famous."
Genie: "Done."
Orphan: "I wish my parents could come back!"
Genie: "I told you I can't bring people back from the dead!"
I don't see why women are complaining about the glass ceiling. I mean, if they reach high enough, they can clean it...
Is it just me, or can I see the Roman Empire from how far back your hairline goes?
Why can you bully orphans?
What are they gonna do, tell their parents? Oh wait, they got no parents.
What's the difference between a Russian potato and a U.S. potato?
The U.S. potato can still compete in the Special Olympics.
I just want to say good morning to Gwen and everyone on this site. Have a nice day.
What if it's okay if someone can see my blue jokes, hello, bully, love, crazy, and Ariana jokes? Thanks!
What does a gynecologist and delivery driver have in common?
Whenever they’re hungry, they can just scrape a little cheese off the top of the box.
The only thing they can see are their chopsticks.
I asked my mom if I can help her out with the cooking, she answered yes.
A few hours later, dinner was ready and dad came to join. Mother said, "Honey, can you get the mashed potatoes?" Dad said, "Why, she’s right here."
A man walks into a pharmacy and asks the pharmacist, "May I have a bottle of arsenic, please?" She is shocked. "Why would you want something like that?" The man calmly tells her, "I want to poison my unfaithful wife and her lover." The pharmacist is now horrified. She said, "I can not possibly give you that. It is completely illegal and I would lose my license and be prosecuted for conspiracy and murder!" At this point the man hands the pharmacist a photo of his unfaithful wife having sex with the pharmacist's husband. She examines it then looks up at him. "Oh. I didn't know you had a prescription."
I wish the grass in my backyard was emo.
So it can cut itself.
In the new Justice League movie, Flash can break glass by touching it, why is that?
Because Flash is not supported on Windows.
My brother and I were roughhousing and accidentally knocked over our bookshelf. My mom came in and started asking who knocked it over, to which I replied that I only had my shelf to blame.
Hey, can I axe you a question?
My brother likes to build "traps" to capture our cat so he can pet it. I said it wasn't gonna catch anyone, he replied with "not going to stop who?" I told him not to worry that it could capture any two.
What type of cake can orphans not have?
Homemade.
What is the difference between a Mexican and a bench?
The bench can support its family.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't find home. 😀😀
Hey Gwen come on let's chat! We can forget about that dumb bitch "prince" and focus on us!