Body jokes
I have a green ball in one hand and one in the other. What am I holding?
Shrek's dick.
What did one ass cheek say to the other?
"Blimey, what's that smell coming from the corridor?"
You're so much like a marshmallow, you're so squishy and sticky, and everyone puts their sticks inside of you.
Touch your toes and hold them. Then spell "run." It will say, "r.u.n."
Bro, tampons look like sperms, and they go up your coochie.
If you can’t touch your brain or see your brain, you don’t have a brain?
I poo 11 times a day.
Your forehead is so big, your mom spent half of the time in the delivery room giving birth to just your head.
I got a call from McDonald's; they want their sign back.
My foot itches.
I'm gonna eat a hell of a lot of popcorn kernels before I die just to make the cremation a little more interesting.
U mess with goose, he strain out all of your body juice.
U mess with goose, he hang u with noose.
Yes, I have gained weight. I have also gained more brains. Do you want some? You talk like you definitely need some more.
What's still together after all the sh*t they've been through? Your butt cheeks.
I spy with my little eye something starting with, actually I have TWO normal eyes.
Q) Why is Technoblade's body hard?
A) Cuz he was thinking of children on his deathbed!
Two boys were at a lake, and they went to a bush and saw a naked lady.
One ran away, the other one followed the one who ran and asked why he ran. The boy answered, "My mum told me if I saw a naked lady I would turn to stone. I ran away because I felt something get hard."
Why do we call them dead bodies? Nobody says "alive bodies!" Like you walk into your workplace, "OMFG IT'S FULL OF BODIES! Alive ones, though." You wouldn't give birth and say, "Come on, husband, help me with the bodies." If it's a surprise party, you wouldn't say, "QUICK, HIDE THE BODIES!" And the person who the party was for wouldn't say "OH MY GOD WHY ARE THEY DEAD!"
What does a dick and an elderly person have in common? They are both short.
"Deez nutz" are a hairline.