If I looked like Stephen Hawking, I would also be an atheist.
Science flew us to the moon. Religion flew us into two skyscrapers.
What’s the difference between a woman that doesn’t belong in the kitchen and Bigfoot?
Bigfoot is real.
What do you call a person with a hole in their shoe?
A Christian.
Why don't churches have Wi-Fi?
They can't compete with an invisible force that actually works.
What is meals on wheels to a Christian nationalist that is also a conservative Republican politician, a gay man in a wheelchair that is poor and also physically handicapped, and who is also well-endowed?
A 23 year old priest walks into a high school with an automatic weapon. He tells those who believe in God to stand up and leave.
To the children who don't leave, he says, "Do not worry my children, I shall make thou 'hole-y' as well."
He then proceeds to shoot all of the students left.
Bible Verse of The Day - For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, "Abba, Father." The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God's children.
—Romans 8:15-16
Whoever invented religions, they fucked up.
We got all kinds of retarded adults believing in mythologies.
Atheists don't solve exponential equations because they don't believe in higher powers.
God's consciousness: Art.
God's unconsciousness: Christianity.
The undertaker's famous saying is "Rest In Peace" to all of his opponents, but really they don't rest in peace. The only peace they get is from God.
What is another name 🤔 for Holy water 💧💧💧💧💧💧💧💧💧 💧💧💧💧💧💧💧💧 🚽 toilet water.
An LDS preacher knocks on the door with a chalice of wine offering to do the sacrament.
The person living there points and says, "Begone, foul blood-drinker!"
And promptly the preacher bursts into flames, leaving nothing but ash.
A Christian, a Jew, and a Catholic walk into a bar. The Christian says, “Where’s Mohammed?”
What do you get when you cross an atheist an insomniac?
Someone who stays up all night wondering if there's a dog.
Where has God existed outside of a man's awareness of him?
Where do terrorists go for a drink?
At the Allahu-ak Bar.
What does B.I.B.L.E stand for?
Bullshit In Book Lacking Evidence.
Kat, what? I did. A cat jump over the road because he believes he came flying in the clouds. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah! So funniest kitten kitten kitten kidding is my last time of Do you Joooooooooooooooooooooookin?
