What movie do atheists watch for Christmas?
Coincidence on 34th Street
One day, a priest is walking down the street and sees a little girl with a box. "What's in the box?", the priest asks. "Christian kittens", the little girl answers. Pleased, the priest smiles and continues on his way. A week later, the same priest is walking down the street with a nun when he sees the little girl and the box again. "Ask her what she has in the box", he says, "It's the cutest thing!" The nun walks up and asks the girl what she has in the box. "Atheist kittens", she says. The priest rushes forward and says "ATHEIST KITTENS!!! Last week you said they were "Christian kittens!!!" "They were", she says. "Now their eyes are open".
What do you call an atheist bone? -- A blasfemur.
Why can't atheists solve exponential equations?
Because they don't believe in higher powers.
I moved all the bibles to the fiction section because there is no god as said Stephen Hawking in 2011 but in 2018 god said there was no Stephen Hawking
7 year old Christian: *walks up to atheist menacingly* YoU nEeD sOmE jEsUs SaViNg! Atheist: you prey to a Jewish zombie and I need saving?
What's the difference between 5% of priests and 5% of atheists? 5% of atheists have seen a ghost 5% of priests have spooked altar boys in the sacristy
Why can't Stephen hawking go to heaven cause he walk up the stairs
"A dyslexic atheist lies awake at night wondering if there really is a Dog."
Atheists don't solve exponential equations because they don't believe in higher powers.
What do you get when you cross an atheist an insomniac? Someone who stays up all night wondering if there's a dog
if i looked like Stephen Hawkings i would also be an atheist.
