Belief jokes
Autists either believe everything you tell them or are nonstop skeptics. There is no in-between.
What is the difference between a nun and a hooker?
One makes you believe in Heaven, the other makes you feel it.
What's the difference between a Christian and a child who believes Santa exists?
Nothing. They both believe in fairytales!
What's the difference between a Christian and a child who believes Santa exists?
Nothing. They both believe in fairytales!
If an Indian kid is conceived in incest, would that make them OMbred?
Jokes are like Indians.
They never die, they just get reincarnated.
How do you know you’re at a gay church?
Half the congregation is kneeling.
The best way to tell a Hindu person and a Muslim person apart is asking them, "Are you 7-Eleven or 9/11?"
The best way to tell a Hindu person and a Muslim person apart is asking them:
"Are you 7-Eleven or 9/11?"
The fool says in his brain, "There is a god."
I don’t understand why Christians are so against body piercings. Didn’t Jesus have four?
How do flat-earthers travel?
On a plane.
My girlfriend who is a Jehovah's Witness had sex with me so hard, she turned to Christianity.
I believe everything in the Bible until I read about the Jew giving out the free fish.
What do two priests say to each other when they walk into an orphanage?
"Let us pray."
The little girl's dad was Jewish and her mom was Catholic. Mom had been taking the little girl to church every Sunday.
One Sunday, during High Mass, the little girl whispers to her mom, “Mom, can we go home now?”
“No honey, not yet,” replied the mother, “the Mass is only half over.”
“Then we can go now, Mom. I'm half Jewish.”
I was in the corner shop to buy some lottery tickets, and the Indian woman was sporting a red dot on her forehead. I scratched it off and won a fucking Ford Focus!
Why does JD Vance not need a conviction?
His running mate has 34 of them!
Why is Christianity the most dramatic religion?
Because other religions say, "Do, do, do."
But Christianity says, "Done, done, done!"
Scientists make skyscrapers and airplanes.
Religion crashes them.