Behavior jokes
Ugh... I hate Anons so much, they're annoying as fuck.
People, when your lover cheats on you, do this!
1. Start a conversation. 2. Say, "What's that smell?" 3. They will smell around. 4. Say, "OMG, it's a b****," and walk away and ignore them.
So dark.
Many jokes about orphans.
God, this is the second worst thing to happen to these orphans!
My wife said I didn’t listen to a single thing she says.
What a weird way to start a conversation!
You have an entire life being an idiot, why not take a day off?
Jonny went to Disney and they had sour balls. He asked the cashier for some and he pulled down his pants.
Why did the cat meow?
Because it's a cat, and they meow.
For me, the best part of depression is remaining charming around strangers but saving the misery for the ones who love you.
Why did the emo kid cross the road? To get a box of tissues!
You was reaching into you’re backpack and the whole class jumped through the window.
Family all eating at the table.
Brother: "Hmm, I think I feel gold."
Sister: "Stop the cap."
Brother looks under the table and says, "Nope, just a gold digger."
Dad laughed.
Stepmom storms out of the room.
If you bully a kid, bully an orphan.
What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Violence breeds violence, nothing else.
How do you help a starving cannibal?
You give him a hand!
What is the difference between a man peering through the key hole and a woman in the bath?
One is rude and nosy; the other is rude and nosy.
Even people who are good for nothing can bring a smile to your face.
For instance, when you push them down the stairs.
Yo mama so dumb, she put a watch in a piggybank and said she was saving time.
Johnny is on his way to school when he comes across a frog. With a sudden inspirational thought, he picks the frog up, shoves a firecracker up the frog's arse, lights the cracker, and blows the frog to smithereens.
Now at school, the teacher asks the class: "Has anybody got anything for show and tell this morning?"
Johnny waves his arm in the air and is virtually screaming "Me mis me mis me mis".
"Ok Johnny, what do you have to share with the class today?"
Little Johnny then says, "Well on my way to school today I shoved a cracker up a frog's arse." The teacher interrupts and says, "It's not arse Johnny, It's rectum."
Johnny then says, "Fucking oath it wrecked 'im."
How do you get an emo out of a tree?
You cut the rope.
When you see someone, you say, "Go suck bananas."