Woman

Person

I asked a pretty, young homeless woman if I could take her home. She smiled at me and said yes. The look on her face soon changed, however, when I walked off with her cardboard box.

Orphan

Anonymous

Why can’t orphans play baseball? They don’t know where home is

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Darkness

Anonymous

Kid: hey dad whats dark humor ? Dad: go walk up to that homeless guy and throw a rock at him . Kid: but dad I dont have any legs or arms . Dad: exactly son.

6

Box

Anonymous

I saw a beautiful homeless girl and asked if I could take her out on a date. She politely accepted and enjoyed herself. Soon after I asked if I could take her home, she smiled and nodded her head. Her smile disappeared when she saw me running away with her cardboard box.

Girl

Anonymous

What’s the best part of dating a homeless girl?

You can drop her off anywhere.

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Kid

Sneaky frie

A starving homeless kid ask me for food

I said “sorry,my plate is full”

Man

Not a killer

Why did the homeless man stop to help the kids cross the streat?

To get them into his van.

Common

Anonymous

What do Ellen DeGeneres and homeless people have in common?

They don’t cook because they love eating out

Orphan

Orphanator

What do you call a grown up orphan? Homeless

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Orphan

J0K35 (week 1)

what do you get when you cross the terms homeless and abandoned?

POORphan

Orphan

Anonymous

(I want to apologize in advance. These are very dark jokes)

  1. What’s red and bad for your teeth? A brick

  2. I was going to tell a dead baby joke. But I decided to abort.

  3. Why does Dr. Pepper come in a bottle? His wife is dead.

4.Why does Helen Keller hate porcupines? They’re painful to look at.

  1. Why can’t orphans play baseball? They don’t know where home is.

  2. Give a man a match, and he’ll be warm for a few hours. Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

  3. I asked a pretty, young homeless woman if I could take her home. She smiled at me and said yes. The look on her face soon changed, however, when I walked off with her cardboard box.

  4. My wife and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children. If anybody does, please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.

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Difference

Anonymous

Two homeless alcoholics want to get drunk but don’t have enough money for even the cheapest drinks in any bar. So one of them devises a clever plan : he tells his friend “We should buy a hot-dog sausage with the last of our money and stick it down my pants, then drink a load of drinks but then when the bill comes you get down and suck on the hot-dog and it’ll look like you’re sucking on my dick so then we’ll get thrown out without paying and we can just go to another bar and do the same thing again”. His friend agrees so they buy the hot-dog, stick it down the first dude’s pants, go to the bar and then the second dude begins to suck on the hot-dog as agreed. They are thrown out and hit another four bars this way. In the end, as they lie drunk on the floor in some alleyway, the second guy says, “Well, what a great night. Free beers in five different bars!” The first guy says “Yeah! Especially since the hot-dog fell out before we even reached the first bar!”

6

Woman

Mr. Dark Joke

I asked a pretty, young homeless woman if I could take her home. She smiled at me and said yes.

The look on her face soon changed, however, when I walked away with her cardboard box.

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Orphan

Awdrgyjilzscgbjml

What do you call an orphan when there 18

Homeless

Man

Anonymous

What did everyone say about the crazy unemployed homeless man? He made no cents

War

Loan Yoda

What do you call a homeless bounty hunter?
Hobo Fett!

Orphan

Anonymous

What does a orphan have that a homeless doesn’t?

A home but what does a homeless person have that orphans don’t?

A parent

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Man

TomGore

What did the pornstar say to the unemployed homeless man? Get a fucking job.

Degree

Moe Lester

What’s worse than having an honourary degree from Harvard? Being homeless and haveing a honourary degree from Harvard.

Party

Anonymous

Boy- your momma so ugly she’s denied from the homeless parties in the dumpster Quiet kid- your momma so funny she made a joke pop out her a*s