Animal jokes
Why do Asians excel at math?
Because their dog can never eat their homework.
What animal do you always find at a baseball game? A bat.
Why did the egg hide? It was a little chicken!
What do you call a drunk cat? A drunk cat.
The man had no arms and a little girl came over and said, "Give me a high-five."
He said, "I’ve got no arms," and the girl said, "Are you an eel? Cause he don’t have arms."
Memes
Roses are red,
Violets are blue, you look like a donkey, and smell like one, too.
Did you hear about the cat jail break out? It was a cat-tastrophe.
What do you get when you dip a duck in blue paint?
A very pissed duck.
What's black and white and read all over?
A newspaper.
What's black, white, black, white, red, white, black, red, black, then red all over?
A penguin falling down the stairs.
What is the difference between an orphan and a cat?
The cat is actually cute.
What's the difference between puppies and orphans?
Puppies actually get picked.
A funny joke:
Knock knock. "Who's there?" Who. "Who who?" Ha, who who, you sound like an owl! "Fuck you!"
Did you hear about the clam that could play violin?
It had excellent mussel memory.
What do crows use when they get a phone?
A "CAWing" card!
Sheep want to wool the world :)
What does the bee say to the fly?
"Buzz off!"
Why are elephants 🐘 so responsible?
Because they keep their belongings in the trunk.
I once tried to have a family friendly conversation with a worm, but it kept its head in the dirt.
What did the mouse 🐭 say when his friend broke their teeth?
Hard cheese! 🧀😂
Why do ducks have feathers?
To cover their butt quacks.