Animal jokes
Why did the Chicken Cross the Road?
Idk.
Did you hear about the boy who sat under a cow?
He got a pat on the head.
Dad: I get to touch animals every day at the zoo.
Kid: Why?
Dad: I clean up animal s*** at the zoo.
Why don't you see elephants hiding in trees?
Bc they're good at it.
Why do the French eat snails?
They don’t like fast food!
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get ran over by a truck.
I say "cow poop," cows say "moonure."
What do you call a fish that has a dick?
Moby Dickkkkk!
My friend went to the zoo yesterday. There was only one dog in a crate.
He said it was a Shitzoo!
If a dog made a computer, it would have a mega bite.
pop pop meow?
What do you call a cow with three legs?
My ex.
Why did the cow cross the road?
To go to the Mooovies.
What do you call a house with dog hair?
A shed.
What does a gay horse eat?
Heyyy!
Was threatened with legal action off my postman this morning!! I was stood havin a smoke when he asked if my dog bites, I said no. Halfway down my path the dog jumped up and bit him on his testicles!! Screaming out in pain he Said I was a lying bitch cos I told him my dog didnt bite!! Told him mine doesnt!! that wasnt my dog!!!
If chickens make chicken nuggies, does that mean dinosaur chickens make Dino nuggies?!?
CONSPIRACY!!!
A dog walked into a tavern and said, “I can’t see a thing. I’ll open this one.” The humor of it is probably related to the Sumer way of life (and has been lost), but the words remain.
If you ever get chased by a police dog, try not to go through a tunnel, then on to a little seesaw, then jump through a hoop of fire.
They're trained for that.
What creature takes the most medicine?
Caterpillar.