Animal jokes
My girlfriend wanted a marriage just like a fairy tale. Fair enough. I gave her a loaf of bread and left her in the forest with a rabid wolf.
What did the fish say when he swam into a wall?
Nothing, because fish can't talk.
Can you go as a horse for Halloween?
Well, if you do, I can't wait to ride you!
What do you call a night person? A night owl 🦉 who is up all night, lol!
They are hairy.
Memes
Why did the fly fly?
Because the spider spied her!
What do you call a lesbian Dinosaur?
Lickalotapuss.
Why can’t baby ducks lay eggs? Because their quacks are too small.
The only time that cows will make noise is when they are in the moooo-d.
What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino?
Answer: Elephino.
There was an animal on my porch, then I shot it in the head. It was strange that it had coffee in its hand. I flipped it over, and it was an animal, but it looked a lot like my kid.
What do cows use for math? A cow-culator 😏
Why did the octopus 🐙 beat the shark in a fight?
Because he was well armed!
What do you call a cat that walks slowly?
CATerpillar
What did the owl that's a detective say?
"Hoo did it?"
Why are dogs born with balls?
They were having their stick moment when they got given birth, too.
What did the koala do when he was too educated?
He ran away from koalapidia.
Why did the duck get arrested?
He tried to quack a safe.
If a bird flies, and a duck can also run and fly, while a cat walks, why do we drink water?
What's the difference between a bison and a buffalo?
You can't wash your face in a buffalo.