Animal jokes
Two whales went to a bar.
The first whale said, "oooooooohhhhhh." The second whale said, "Greg, I think you're drunk, let's go home."
Once I had a cat. The cat liked human beverages.
One day I decided to throw a party. The cat went over to get some soda. There was a line. I told him that he needed to wait in line. The line was too long for the cat. Then he walked to the punch bowl. He saw that there was no punch line. Very much like this joke.
Black dog is gay.
Mary had a little lamb.
Key word is had, her dad's favorite meat is a human!
Why did the ass start a gardening service?
It was great at dropping SEEDS.
uh oh
Why do crabs never give to charity? Because they’re shellfish.
Hahahahahahahaha what a knee slapper!
Why doesn't a teddy bear eat? Because it is already stuffed.
Q. Why did the cow cross the road?
A. Because he/she wanted to watch the moooovie.
What do you call a club that owls go to?
Hooters.
A horse says to the other horse, "Are you hot?"
The other horse says, "Ahhhh, a house that talks!"
Why did the cat cross the road?
To die.
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide.
What do cows read? The moospaper!
Why did the cow cross the road?
To go to the moovies.
A horse walked in a bar and the bartender asked, "Why the long face?"
What did the whale say?
Nothing!
It just wailed.
What do you call a cow you can’t see?
Camooflauged.
Why was the cow scared? Cause he had a nightmoo-r.
If Stephen Hawking was walking, they would have a hawk problem.
What do you call a bull sleeping?
A bull-dozer.