Animal jokes
Why did the duck walk across the road? I lost my pecker!
POV: A person made you mad, but you're Chinese and they have a cat. "CHING CHONG, CHING CHONG, CHING CHONG, BITCH."
Why can’t fish play basketball?
'Cause they are scared of the net.
Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
If they flew over the bay, they would be bagels.
Yesterday, I was on a reality TV show where they locked me up with all those smelly monkeys from the Leger Zoo. It was complete madness.
What's the difference between a piranha and a teenage girl?
The piranha doesn't wear makeup.
Do you know that Helen Keller had a dog?
Neither did she.
Sans: What do you call a skeleton snake?
A rattler!
Sans: ha ha ha ha!!
Why do you stink?
Because you haven't showered, tu, perro.
One time, I was making a caramel apple.
When I mistook 1 gallon of caramel for 1 camel!
What's the difference between a duck?
Are you a bull, because I wanna ride you like a rodeo.
Why don't bald eagles brush their teeth? Because they don't have teeth! xD
What do you call a horse that does karate?
A horse.
What is the sexiest animal alive? The Βυττerfly.
What do you call an animal in space? Just death because you need a spacesuit.
What’s the difference between a chicken and an orphan?
The chicken is actually used for something.
What’s the difference between a cow and 9/11?
A cow can’t be milked for 21 years.
Where do spiders seek health advice? WebMD.
What do you call a cow that can't milk?
A failure!