Animal jokes
Why did the cow go to space? To go to the moon.
Why do cheetahs have spots? Chicken pox.
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Pssh.
"You're fat as a cow."
"......."
"Nope."
What do you call a cow with 2 legs?
Your fat ass mom.
Where do you take your pig to karate?
The pork chop class!
My friend made a joke about a dog. I said it was a "RUFF" joke.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because he wanted to get to the other side and meet his friend.
Why did the Chicken cross the road? You: Why? To get to the little b***h's house!
Knock knock! You: Who's there? The chicken!
Ex-girlfriend: “I can smell fish.”
Ex-boyfriend: “I can smell sh*t.”
Ex-boyfriend: “Well, how many boys swam down there?”
Ex-girlfriend: “20!”
Fish: “Wasn’t me, I don’t swim around mistakes.”
"Captain, captain, the armadillo has been sighted by the lizard!"
What’s the difference between a whale and Lizzo?
Absolutely nothing.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get on the person's face.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Fuck you, that's why.
Why did the cow cross the road?
To go to the Mooovies.
I took my girlfriend to the beach and a marine biologist thought she was a beluga whale!
Yooooooooooooooooooooooo!
"Meow, meow, I'm a dog," said the sped kid.
bnb dcnb cbf
My wife saw me hit the best drive yesterday with my golf clubs.
I must have drove that chihuahua 300 yards.