Aed jokes
What’s the best part of stage four cancer?
A: There’s no stage five.
What's the difference between a priest and McDonald's? They both stick their meat in 10-year-old buns.
Or is she asking her son, "Do you know Newton?"
The boy said, "No, I don't know."
She said to him, "If you had paid attention to your lessons, you would have known him!"
The boy said, "Ok, do you know Ikhlod?"
She said to him, "No, who is she?"
He said to her, "If you had paid attention to your husband, you would have known her."
The important thing is that the boy is currently a week with his uncles and a week with his turbans.
Q: What will we give to a sick lemon?
A: Lemon aid.
He entered (kindergarten) class. The teacher said, "Luce, start for us and say the alphabet." He said, "A B C D E F G H I J K *just kidding* L M N O." Laugh my nose off. The teacher said, "Go to the office right now, young man!" I don't understand, he just said jokes to the teacher, lmao :D
Depressed people have beautiful smiles. Okay, it's not a joke for normal people, but it's a joke for us.
I posted on my Facebook account that you have a picture on Facebook.
Why did the octopus cross the road?
'Cause he was on the same side as a sushi restaurant.
What does a blind kid and an orphan have in common?
They can’t see their parents.
You know when you sign up for something and it says "I'm not a robot"? I guess he never had the chance to tick that.
In 2016, Americans took "Orange is the New Black" to a whole other level.
What do you call a cow that just gave birth?
De-calf-inated.
A bomb is like a baby; when you drop it, everyone screams.
How do you execute a retard?
The Electric Wheelchair.
Why didn't Hitler's girlfriend like giving him a blowjob? It left a Nazi taste in her mouth...
Stephen Hawking walks into a b... nevermind.
What shoes do pedophiles wear? White vans.
How do pedophiles fit in? They force it to go in.
How do you make a 16 mm hole into a 40 mm hole? A pedophile comes in.
What did Santa say when he was passing over some hookers? "Ho ho ho!"
What’s the difference between a prostitute and a homeless shelter?
You can shit a load inside of a prostitute, but if you try it in a shelter, you get arrested.
Kid 1: "Hey, I bet you're still a virgin."
Kid 2: "Yeah, I was a virgin until last night."
Kid 1: "As if."
Kid 2: "Yeah, just ask your sister."
Kid 1: "I don't have a sister."
Kid 2: "You will in about nine months."
Why are Republicans supporting giving felons the right to vote?
Because their own personal jeebus is a felon!