Aed jokes
I told a Chinese man, "Which is better, cats or dogs?"
He said, "Dogs."
I said, "Why?"
He said, "Because dogs tasted better than cats."
What’s the difference between a hooker and a cat?
I haven’t banged a hooker.
What's the difference between a paralyzed kid and a father?
The father gets to leave, while the kid stays.
Q: Why can't pilots play Jenga?
A: Because they will just hit the Twin Towers.
What’s the difference between a WNBA player and a rotten apple? The apple has a chance to make it into the basket.
Me during quarantine
Azibo works 10 hours a day in the sun and is paid 1 euro an hour. Thanks to a fundraiser we will be able to raise the necessary funds to buy a whip to make him work twice as much.
I don't understand why people hate it when they hear a dad joke. They are actually pretty funny, and I will show you Y. (shows a picture of the letter Y)
What is a disabled person's least favorite song?
"I'm Still Standing."
Hitler only wanted peace.
A piece of Poland, a piece of Czechoslovakia, and a piece of Turkey.
I could tell a joke right now, but it's too dark.
How many babies does it take to paint a house? It depends how hard you throw them.
You are so adopted that you don't have a home button on Google Maps.
When a wheelchair kid bends over, wheelchair kid goes “ohhahahhahhahahahahal!”
What do you call an Indian that came home late?
A curfew muncher.
I heard there was a kidnapping.
Don't worry, he woke up in the back of a van.
It was his father's friend who was a priest.
He was just bringing him to church.
I heard life was a gift. Well, I hope they kept the receipt, because I'd like a mother-fucking refund!
Roses are red, violets are blue, I'll be a jaeger, will you be my kaiju?
What do you call a girl furry?
A pussy cat.
If you got a priest, a Rhodes scholar, and a politician in a room, what would you get?
The Royal Commission.
Alternatively, Tony Abbott.
A Russian wedding should be called a Soviet Union.