Aed jokes
Your hairline is so bad man, I gave your doctor a breathalyzer.
By the law, you are not allowed to have a sick bird. That's ill-eagle.
Two flies were playing football in a saucer. One tells the other, “You’ll need more practice if you want to play in the cup!”
Hey, I’m George, and this is how to figure out if someone is a psychopath.
Go into someone’s search history, and find “Cuphead ship fanfic”.
Hey George, why do you have Russia x America countryhumans?
Have you ever had a friend who masturbated many times? I had one who did a lot, but he had no imagination... when he masturbated, he imagines his hand.
What do you get when you have a class of kids and a speeding car?
A 24 killstreak!
You’re so short, you must need a ladder to reach your advice and dreams.
When people make accounts about you and a category.
This bunny named Mason came up to a bar and ordered a beer and a burger. He sits at a table and the waiter brought a huge burger.
Mason: "Heh. Good thing I eat like a horse." He looks up at the waiter.
Waiter: "You are a nasty little bunny, aren't you?"
Mason screamed and ran away as the waiter chased him... she was a HORSE.
The Demon when it gets summoned to earth only to find out it was a spelling mistake in Latin class. 😬
When you see a deer, what do you say?
"Oh deer!"
What do you call a club that owls go to?
Hooters.
There should be a "kick an orphan" day.
What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Gordon Ramsay isn't a racist. If a team screws up, he screams at every person equally—no matter what their skin color.
What's the difference between a T-Rex and your sister? I can't stick my dick in a dinosaur.
Why did the Twin Towers fall exactly at 9/11?
Because the terrorists thought that it would be fun to call 911 as a "prank."
I got a sister.
That was a big mistake.
A man lost his toe when he dropped a knife on it.
Doctor: "I have good news and bad news."
Guy: "What's the bad news?"
Doc: "They replaced your toe with a piece of candy."
Guy: "Good news?"
Doc: "You now have tic tac toe."
What kind of bug can tell time? A clock-roach.
Jaylie 😠: I don't care, what he said was so out of line!
Harvey 😁: It's funny!
Jaylie😠 : He said "Stupid, silly bitch face I raised! I should have known!" That's not funny, Harv!
Harvey 🙁: Come on Jay. Give Chris a chance?
Jaylie 🙄: Sorry but I'm a stupid, silly bitch face he raised. He should have known!
Harvey😟: That's not true!
Jaylie 😣: He even made fun of Kalierien. She is so sensitive!
Harvey 😡: SHUSH!!!!
Kalierien😡: Hi guys, how's your day?
Harvey😁: Good!
Jaylie 🤬: Mine was like living in hell!
Kalierien: 🤬SAME!!!!!