Aed jokes
What do you call Stephen Hawking on a bungy jump?
Spasticelastic.
Q: What do you do when an epileptic has a seizure in the bathtub?
A: Throw in some laundry.
What do you call a duck on drugs?
A quackhead.
If you throw a nun, is it called a... Nunchuck???
Just a joke: When Stephen Hawking fell over and hurt his leg, his dad said, "It'll get better, just walk it off!"
Where did Johnny go after he wandered into a minefield?
Everywhere.
"I'm sorry," the doctor says, "you have a rare and very contagious disease. We must quarantine you, and you'll only be fed cheese and bologna."
"Will that cure me?" the patient asks.
"Well, no," the doctor replies, "but it's the only food that will fit under the door."
Why can’t Michael Jackson win a race?
Because he’s always coming in a lil’ behind.
What do you call a bacon from Chernobyl?
Technoblade!
Roses are red, I hate snitches, You talk a lot of game for a guy with 3 inches.
What are the similarities between a pedophile and a 9/11 plane?
They both came from behind and crushed them.
I hate when my class want to play hangman. Not because they hang a man, but because I get jealous.
I was happy to find I could get a passing grade in all my subjects if I had sex with my teacher, until I remembered I'm home schooled.
What does a Catholic Priest and a commercial from the 80s have in common? They both ask people, "Where's the meat?"
Wanna hear a joke? My life! Hahahah! Just kidding, jokes actually mean something...
Who is more loyal: a dog or a wife?
Well, lock them both in your trunk for two hours and drive around and see which one is happy to see you.
Grandpa's last words: "Why do you have a chainsaw?"
What did the orphan's friend give him for his birthday?
Lego, so he can build a home.
Why can't an orphan make a YouTube channel?
'Cause they can't make it family friendly.
What do a blonde and a doorknob have in common?
Everyone gets a turn ;)