Accident jokes
(Titanic ll) yeah boyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy :) (iceberg) ok at least there isn't 99 more titanics (99 more titanics pop up) yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh boy:) (iceberg) :(
I was camping with my buddy, and there was a fire. We were roasting marshmallows, and there was a vine. I tripped on it and went penis first into the fire, and I said, "Well, there goes your children, stupid ass!"
Why did the Titanic and the iceberg hate each other?
Because the Titanic hit it.
What is yellow but can't swim?
A school bus full of children.
Your mum is so fat, she gets hit by a parked car!
Driving on a road at night and hit a speed bump. Remember, there are no speed bumps... I hit Bambi!
When a kindergarten teacher asks a kid to sing the alphabet, he said "ab3defg." The teacher said, "Do you like 3D?" He said, "Yeah." The teacher yelled, "Okay, do you have a 3DS?" He said yes. The teacher goes into his bag and says, "Say ABCs or your 3DS will be destroyed." He says, "ab3defghijlmnopqrs." "Oh, he learned well." The teacher threw the 3DS out the window. The kid gets it, and it still works. Then he googles ABCs. It goes to YouTube and says, "abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz." The teacher is proud of the 3DS. The class went home telling parents.
What's black, white, and red?
A nun that fell down an elevator shaft.
Why did Paul Walker die? Because he crashed a car into a tree.
When this guy fell off a cliff, he got an A+ for egg-cellence!
What did John say after someone shot his leg?
Oof!
I hate it when I accidentally eat out my dog, lol.
Why did ItsFunneh go on the road? She so Draco looking at a car then the car runs over him, sad Draco.
What’s the difference between a computer and Paul Walker? I give a crap when my computer crashes.
A man walked into a fleshlight and died.
Why is Ronan's forehead the size of Jupiter? Because he dropped the TV on his forehead. It also had rings.
Why is Jupiter's ring stuck in orbit? Because Ronan's forehead kept it stuck in orbit.
Snails are like sperm, slow and sloppy.
When you accidentally choke your girlfriend to death and then realize that it's your sister so who gives a f**k?
Where did Joe go after getting lost in a minefield?
Everywhere.
I was once playing the bottle flip challenge on the school table with my friend, and when it was his turn, the bottle fell to his eggplant! 😱😂
How fast did Little Sally paint the barn red?
As soon as the bomb exploded on her.