Worst Jokes Ever
I bought a coffin on Black Friday. It was a killer deal.
I saw names carved into a tree and thought it was romantic. Until I realized how many people bring knives on dates.
Communists don't play Minecraft.
They play Ourcraft.
What did Michael Jackson say when dinner was ready? Ea-ea-eat.
"Doctors are just the same as lawyers; the only difference is that lawyers merely rob you, whereas doctors rob you and kill you too."
Why can't Juice WRLD hit rock bottom?
Because he's too high.
I asked for emotional support. They handed me a mirror and said, "Talk to someone who cares."
I used to be into fitness. But running from my problems got exhausting.
What's the difference between a prostitute and a Democrat? A Democrat will keep screwing you when you run out of money.
My dog is called Syndrome. He jumps up at me and I shout, "Down, Syndrome! Down, Syndrome!"
Rip Juice WRLD.
What does Michael Jackson say when it gets hot?
He-he-eat!
On September 11, 2001, I was in geometry class.
On that day, we learned you can remove one side of a pentagon by intersecting it with a plane.
What's the difference between a prostitute and a Democrat? A prostitute will stop screwing you when you run out of money.
What's the difference between a sheet and a baby?
One of them is really loud when you iron it.
My first time sex was like buying my first used, crappy car.
I didn't want it, but Dad gave it to me anyway.
"Having too much sex can result in memory loss."
I read that on page 37, paragraph five of the New England Medical Journal on September 15th, 2014, at 10:37 AM.
What do autistic retards and birds have in common?
They both flap their arms, lol.
If a stork brings white babies, and a blackbird black babies, what bird brings no babies?
A swallow.
What do you call a can opener that doesn't work?
A can't opener.