Worst Jokes Ever
What do masturbation and brain damage have in common? After a few strokes, there’s no going back.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan? Apples get picked. Orphans don't.
Why is it so hard to find people defending suicide in any discussion?
Because they are really committed to their cause.
Why was the two-piece swimsuit invented?
To separate the meat section from the dairy section.
What is the speed limit for sex? 68, because if you go any faster, you’ll have to turn around.
How do you know when you're near Wacko Jacko's grave? When 'Thriller' is out and about.
What do masturbation and brain damage have in common? After a few strokes, there’s no going back.
What's a lesbian's favorite candy?
Licorice.
What do you call a blonde girl standing on her hands?
A brunette with bad breath.
How do you flatten curves?
With an abortion.
Why is reverse cowgirl illegal in Alabama? Because you should never turn your back on family.
What do Rihanna and a DJ have in common?
They know how to get a beat down.
Google 'dancing Israelis'.
What does a one-night stand have in common with earthquakes? You never know how long they'll last.
What's Michael Jackson's favorite thing to do when nobody's home?
Beat it.
Explain Bear is my favorite.
Why does Santa come down the chimney? Because he knows he isn't allowed to come in the back door.
Nah, did your barber catch a seizure while lining you up?
If a pregnant emo kills herself, is it murder-suicide?
My neighbor's daughter gave me a three-course meal last night:
Starters - role play and stripping.
Main course - Reverse Cowgirl.
Dessert - Blowy.