Yours jokes

Why don't orphans like getting lost?

Because if people find them, they ask, "Where are your parents?"

What's the difference between your job and a dead prostitute?

Your job still sucks!

Sometimes, you've got to specifically go out of your way to get into trouble. It's called fun.

Your forehead is so big, they used it for the Berlin Wall and the USA border.

There's a new Viagra and prune juice diet that's out.

Unfortunately, you can't tell if you're coming or going.

How do you know when you're near Wacko Jacko's grave? When 'Thriller' is out and about.

You will find Taylor Swift on the streets before you find your hairline.

What’s one thing that comes up at the worst possible time and ruins your day?

A period.

When should you discourage your husband from exercising and dieting? When he wants to fit in your clothes!

Your hairline go so far back it remember the Civil War, ugly ahh.

I have no problem with prostitution.

It's like an Air BnB for your dick.

Job interview: "What's your greatest weakness?"

"Honesty."

"I don't think honesty is a weakness."

"I don't give a fuck what you think."

How can you tell if your husband is dead?

The sex is the same, but you get to use the remote.

Your hairline is so far gone that you could build a runway.

Your mom has quite the mouth on her.

As I found out last night. Oh, what a night!! 😏 😉 😜

My grandad and your hairline go way back.

Your hairline's so ugly, it turned Medusa to stone!

The farmers were playing chess, and the winner shouted and said: "I killed your horse!"

The second quickly left, and when he returned he said: "We have poisoned all your cows!"

If you are a girl and your favorite movie as a kid was Mulan, they successfully made a man out of you.

Your mom's so poor, she chased the garbage truck with her grocery list.