You jokes
What do you call Holly and Elenji?
A couple.
What do you call an angry shopper?
A cuss-tomer.
If you were a booger, I'd pick you first.
Roses are red, I like weed,
If you say yes then I'll do a "good deed."
Tuxedos suit you.
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh f-i-s-h (and the eye).
I saw your mother get into a white Ford Taurus on the corner of Milton and Halliburton, and you're still trying to tell me she ain't got no job cause she "can't get a ride to work?"
Knock it out, you poo-a-loo, go get your loo.
What do you call a chicken that catches ghosts? A poultrygeist.
Does your cat scratch you?
Yeah, I need [to] give him payback, but now he won't respond.
"Yes?" she inquires with a knowing smile. "May I help you?"
"I was wondering," whispers the man, "are you the one who gives the handjobs?"
"Yes," she purrs, "I am."
The man replies, "Well, wash your hands, I want a cheeseburger."
Why tie when you can knot?
Did you hear about the delivery boy that worked for that Italian Restaurant down the street?
Yeah, he Pasta-Way.
What do you call a belt with a watch on it?
A waist of time!
Q: Get up for a chair joke!
A: Oh, never mind, you can sit down.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Who.
Who who?
You sound like an owl.
Tell all the skeleton jokes you want, but I've got thick skin.
How do you fit a hundred babies into a small bucket?
With a blender.
Doctor, what is wrong with me?
You will never be able to walk again. It ain't like with me on the field it would make the Miami Dolphins any better.
Friend: Knock, knock.
Me: Who's there?
Friend: Short.
Me: Short who?
Friend: Short you!
Me: 🙁
Friend: 🤣