You jokes
What do you tell someone who has depression?
Answer: Just hang in there.
What do you call a girl who is thirsty for water?
An H2hoe.
Chris Rock: Jada, I can't wait to see you in G.I. Jane 2!
Fresh Prince of Bel-Air theme song starts playing:
Will: "I got in one lil' fight about my wife's lost hair, she said, 'Will, if you don't do something I'm gonna have an affair!'" 😂😂😂
Knock knock, who's there? God.
God who? NO, you idiot, there is no God. I am your father and you have locked me out of my own house!
Roses are red, I like weed,
If you say yes then I'll do a "good deed."
What do you call a fake noodle? Impasta.
What do you call a blonde in the freezer?
Her parents named her Cindy, so we should probably continue to call her that. She was supposed to graduate tomorrow.
The Schönes restaurant has a great atmosphere. Order a counter and pay Tari, or Eich super made sure food and drinks stayed upright.
The historic gastronomy of the Hochspreizener, however, is even better. The lasagna is delicious and the rest will be waiting for you for days. Microwave effect. War is great.
This company is not cheap and the methods are excellent.
Q: How do you know an Asian person was in your house?
A: Your homework is done, breakfast is made, and your cat is gone.
What did the ankle say to the doorman?
You are a nonsense.
Murder is the same as suicide, except the other person is doing it for you.
One day, Little Susie got her monthly bleeding for the first time in her life.
Not quite certain what was happening, and somewhat frightened, she decided to tell Little Johnny. Little Susie dropped her panties and showed Little Johnny what was happening.
Little Johnny's eyes opened wide in amazement. "You know," he said, "I'm not a doctor, but it looks like someone just ripped your balls off!"
How do you know you're following a DeLorean? The white line disappears.
A guy went to a bar and said to a friend that he found a girl on the railroads and said they had the best sex ever.
His friend asked, "Did you get any head?"
The guy said, "No, I couldn't find it."
What would you do if you see a guy suffocating from the heat? I would call and dial 911, holy shit!
An orphan asked if they could move into my house yesterday. I said, "Don't you have a family?"
Have you ever heard Stephen Hawking sing?
"Head, shoulders, wheels and frames, wheels and frames!"
One man's trash is another man's treasure.
Wonderful saying, horrible way to find out you were adopted.
What do you call two Mexicans in a sleeping bag?
A Twix.
What does a Rubik's cube and a penis have in common?
The more you play with it, the harder it gets.