You jokes
Boy: Wanna hear about my dick? Never mind, it's too short.
Girl: Wanna hear about my pussy? Fuck no, you won't get it.
What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.
What do you call a cow jumping over barbed wire? Utter destruction.
What do you call an emo's face?
Elmo's son.
What do you do when you're sad?
Nothing, because you are just crying about something happening to you.
What do you call a Mexican Baptism?
Bean Dip.
Knock knock.
Fuck you!
One day, a kid walks up to their mom and asks, "Why is my name Daisy?" The mom's reply is, "Because when you were born, a daisy landed on your head." The second kid asks, "Why is my name Butterfly?" The mom's reply is, "Because when you were born, a butterfly landed on your head." Then you hear, "Ooooooooohahbfisbfsdkf."
"Shut up, Brick!"
My mom gave me a golden shovel and a hoe. I said, "Why do I need this?" She said, "That you every year."
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Candace. Candace who? Candace be true, you don’t remember me?
What do you call a group of depressed teens?
Suicide Squad.
Teacher: Why were you late?
Me: Traffic.
Teacher: Did I did it?
Me: Did I even blame it on you?
What do you say when your brother has too many jeans?
"Gene-ious!"
God: Why is the teenager so short?
Angel: I don't know.
God: I said, "Strong as a bear!"
Angel: No, you said, "Ass hair."
God: No, I didn't!
Are you a knife? Because damn, I want you inside of me ;)
I told my grampa hello, and I said, "Hope you die!" hahahhhhahahahahahhahahahhahaha
You know how they said weight people can't jump? Check out the 9/11 videos.
Teacher: "Okay, so how are you going?"
Student: "I'm not going."
Teacher: "Oh, so you're a wheelchair person?"
"Dad, did you get a haircut?"
"No, I got them all cut!"
Tip for Kindness for the day.
Tip one. Always speak up for yourself.
Yes, letting someone else speak up for you is nice but also speak up for yourself, be brave if a mean bully comes along. Speak up for yourself and others if they need it. Best, Gwen