What do you call a girl with no legs?
Unshakeable.
You Jokes
Magician: "I am the greatest magician in the whole world. Look, now you see the rabbit in the hat, and now it is gone!"
Redneck girl: "That's nothing. My dad is the greatest magician! He disappears for a whole year and reappears at Christmas for a couple of hours!"
You're so poor that when you drink water from a cup, people flick a coin into it.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana.
Jack got high and slapped his thigh and said, "You know you wanna."
Jill said yes, picked up her dress and said, "Let's have some fun!"
Silly ole Jill forgot her pill, and now they have a son.
So things are just too tiring to sort out... like which adoption center you should send your son to?
If you know you know lmao
You should always wash your sex toys. That’s why priests invented baptism.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I was born pretty, what happened to you?
*gets hit by a car*
Passerby: "ARE YOU OKAY?"
Me: "Please...I need my...phone."
*opens twitter*
Me: "LMFAOOOOOOO YALL GUESS WHAT"
What do you do if your dick is smoking?
Get your mum to lick it.
Your family is so poor, when you knocked on the door for money, I offered you a penny, and when you knocked again, the rock answered and knocked you out.
Are you a builder, because you give me an erection.
Man, your hairline is so bad it started from the beginning of the month to the end!
What is an oven that you don’t own? Nacho oven.
How do you confuse a blonde?
Tell them to stand in the corner in a round room.
What do you call the door that is cute and adorable?
What comes in and comes out, but you should never miss it?
Any ideas?
SHIT!!!!
What do you call angry midgets?
Short-tempered.
The police gave you a fine for not fixing your ugly hairline.
What do you find at the end of a rainbow?
Answer: W.
I'll never forget my grandpa's last words:
"You need to park a little closer."
