My mother wanted to test my responsibility and wanted me to cook dinner for the family to help mean understand how it feels to constantly cook for a whole family. So me with my horrible humor decided to make a giant joke for when dinner time came around and so I just got four plates and set them in front of my family and I then said, “Here you are a fine African meal.” then everybody looked at me in disappointment and then I continued to say, “what poor taste?”

Chuck Norris can pick an apple from an orange tree and make the best lemonade you’ve ever tasted.

Apparently Monica Lewinsky didn’t vote for Hillary Clinton this election. She said the last Clinton presidency left a bad taste in her mouth.

  1. My phone battery lasts longer than your relationships.

  2. Oh you’re talking to me, I thought you only talked behind my back.

  3. My name must taste good because it’s always in your mouth.

two cannibals are eating a clown, when one cannibal looks up and asks the other cannibal…Does he taste funny to you?

Cannibal eats missionary, gets a taste for religion

why dont cannibals eat clowns

because they taste funny

I’ll never forget how my grandmother died. “this lemonade tastes like bleach…”

So I caught my girlfriend masturbating with a carrot. My first reaction was “Shit, I was gonna eat that later, but now it’s gonna taste like carrots!”

wo tall trees, a birch and a beech, are growing in the woods. A small tree begins to grow between them, and the beech says to the birch, “Is that a son of a beech or a son of a birch?” The birch says he cannot tell, but just then a woodpecker lands on the sapling. The birch says, “Woodpecker, you are a tree expert. Can you tell if that is a son of a beech or a son of a birch?” The woodpecker takes a taste of the small tree and replies, “It is neither a son of a beech nor a son of a birch, It is, however, the best piece of ash I have ever poked my pecker into.”

What do you call a steak that tastes bad? A MISsteak

What’s wrong with a gay bbq?

All the hotdogs taste like shit

So there I was, having a fantastic time going down on my nan When suddenly I got a nasty taste in my mouth.

“Wait a minute” I said. This distinctly tastes like horse semen

Then it clicked. “Ah, so that’s how you died”

How did the Hillbilly mother find out her daughter entered puberty? Her sons dick tasted funny.

People are like potatoes.

We may look different, but we all taste the same with a little ketchup.

So a daughter goes to her dad and says “daddy can I borrow the car?” He the tells her “you know what to do”. So then she proceeds to suck him off, almost immediately pulls out in disgust and says “ugh tastes like shit” her dad then said “damn I forgot your brother took the car”

I saw my sister masturbating with a carrot. I said “Come on I was gonna eat that later! Now it’s just gonna taste like carrots!”

Son: Dad do you remember your first blowjob? Dad: Ohhh yeah I do! Son: How did it taste? Dad: Get out.

How can you tell when you’re sister is on her period?

Your dads knob tastes funny

A teacher is doing an experiment, about taste. she tells each student to line up so she can give them each a lifesaver, so they can tell her what flavor it is. she gives Suzy a pineapple one, Suzy tries it, says the flavor, and then goes and sits back down. that is the same for everyone, then it is Jhonny’s turn, the teacher hands him a honey flavor one, Jhonny chews it for a while, then says, “Teacher, I don’t know what it is.”. the teacher tries to give him a hint and says "it’s what you parents call each other when your alseep". immedietly the boy behind Jhonney screams "spit it out Jhonny it’s an asshole!!!"

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