You jokes
Are you a banana...
because I find you a-peeling!
Papyrus: Sans, stop being a lazy Bones.
Sans: Why bro, guess you don't have the back bone to do anything, heheh.
Son: Hey Dad, can I play Fortnite?
Dad: I don't know, do you want a girlfriend?
Disabled man stands up.
Blind man: “You can stand?”
Deaf man: “You can see?”
Mute man: “You can hear?”
Disabled man: “You can talk?”
Doctor: “What the actual fuck?”
Other doctor: “FUCK THIS, I QUIT!”
I will never forget my mother and father's last words.
"Where the Sam hell did you get a grenade?"
I would tell you a joke about my dink, but it's too long.
Did you hear about Alicia's car accident?
She was really drunk and all over the road until she was all over the road.
I'd hit you, but if I did, I'd go to jail for animal abuse.
What do you do when you're sad? Kick an orphan!
What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Will you remember me in 7 years?
(Yes)
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Aside from being sexy, what do you do for a living?
Foreplay in may areas: "You awake?"
Way down South: "You awake, mom?"
Why do they never serve beer at a math party?
Because you can't drink and derive.
This one is for Gwen, I'm sorry people are so mean to you.
All the big cats gathered for a game of poker. Why did the tiger lose?
Because one of his opponents kept on lion. Another had a puma-nent poker face. But the real problem was the cheetah.
Tip for Kindness for the day.
Tip one. Always speak up for yourself.
Yes, letting someone else speak up for you is nice but also speak up for yourself, be brave if a mean bully comes along. Speak up for yourself and others if they need it. Best, Gwen
Why do orphans play GTA?
To be wanted.
Why do orphanages give out free phones?
So you can press the home button.
In America, you find Waldo.
In Soviet Russia, Waldo finds you.
Person: So you know that person's name you say when you make a hoop, well he's dead.
Friend: Yeah, John Wilkes Booth.
Person: How dare you say that he killed Abraham Lincoln?
Friend: Terrible guy but he never missed a shot!
What do you call a cow that lives in Africa? Moo-fasa!
Why can you bully orphans?
What are they gonna do, go tell their parents?