You jokes

Line

What do you do when you run out of lines on your book?

You look at the emo girl and say, "Hey, can I borrow your arm?"

Rape

How do you get your appeal for rape charges accepted? Say you were expressing your desire for a woman, which is protected under the Constitution in freedom of expression.

Orphan

Judge: We shall now sentence you for the murder of your parents.

Accused: Please consider a lenient sentence, your honor.

Judge: But why?

Accused: Because I’m an orphan.

Memes

Grandma

What did the grandma say at the hospital when you pulled the tube?...................

Teeth

What has teeth but doesn't use them to chew? The answer would be a comb or a piano, but technically, if you ripped someone's teeth out and hand them to them, they have teeth but can't chew with them.

Orphan

What do you call an orphan who grows up to become a priest?

Father Les.

Jesus

What's the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus?

You can hang the picture with one nail.

God

Knock knock, who's there? God.

God who? NO, you idiot, there is no God. I am your father and you have locked me out of my own house!

Owl

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Who.

Who who are you? Are you an owl or something?

Post

If you like this post, you will die!!!! Don’t do it 👿😅😎

Vault

What’s the difference between a bank vault and you aunt's anus?

The owner of bank vaults don’t force you to penetrate it.

Roast

Roses are red, violets are blue, you are so ugly that no one likes you.

Fart

So I’m riding in the car with my dad and all of a sudden I smell something rank without warning.

My dad starts laughing at me.

Dad: “Son! That must have been an orphan fart! You know why?”

Me: “Why dad?”

Dad: “Because it ain’t got no pop!”

Caillou

Mom, can I be a firefighter when I grow up?

Mom: Oh, you won't grow up, Caillou.

Atheist

7 year old Christian: *walks up to atheist menacingly* YoU nEeD sOmE jEsUs SaViNg!

Atheist: You prey to a Jewish zombie and I need saving?