When jokes
Yo mama so fat, when she went on the weighing scale, it said, "To be continued."
What did the fish say when he ran into the wall?
Dam.
What do you get when you throw a pebble in the ocean?
A wet pebble.
What do you call it when Panera Bread shuts down?
Panera is dead.
When you can’t see your adopted joke pop up, it’s the same as asking your adopted friend where their parents are and never finding it.
joe mama roast
When you're watching "Gnomeo and Juliet 2" and your dad walks in on the gnome shaking his butt.
"Prince, I'm ready to chat when you are. I'm in bed, so yeah, let's chat! Love you!"
What happens when you eat a cat?
I love to eat cats for dinner!
Why do tampons have strings? So you can floss your teeth when you’re done eating.
Your mama is so fat that when she jumped, they found water on Mars.
"What do we want?" "HEARING AIDS!" "When do we want them?" "HEARING AIDS!"
Mommy, mommy! Are we liars?
"Shut up and cross your fingers when you say that."
Unlike the Americans, Hitler knew when to kill himself.
So, I was sitting with my little brother and talking about our dreams. "What do you wanna be when you grow up?" I asked him. He answered, "A doctor!" I wanted to tease him so I said, "I wouldn't be treated by a doctor like you." I was hoping he would get mad or something, but instead, he calmly replied, "Brother, I said doctor. Not a vet."
You're so fat that when you were born, the nurse mistook you for the father.
What do you get when skeletons are dancing in a tin can?
Noise!
My boyfriend and I were playing baseball last night with some of our friends. Halfway through the game we took a break and he asked me to hold his balls for him whilst he went to the toilet.
All our friends were shocked when I went into the boys' bathroom with him.
You are American when you walk to the bathroom. What are you when you are in there?
You're-a-peein'. European.
What do a bullet and a police officer have in common?
When a bullet kills someone, it gets fired.
What do you call a stoner when horny?
A weed whacker!