When jokes
Dam, sometimes when I look at my friend's head, I say, "Dam, that's a dam big head, Nick." Then he is like, "Dude, that's a literal dam."
When I get home from school, I always lay on my floor crying and wishing I was dead.
Yo mama so fat, when she got on the scale it said, “I need your weight, not your phone number.”
Why are bald people very easily manipulated by a shower?
Because when they take a bath, they get brainwashed!
When you see a woman with a leg chain, what usually comes to your mind?
When he figures out your 12:
You're so bald, when you wear a turtleneck, you look like roll-on deodorant!
What do you do when a French kid steals your pencil?
Load your MP-40 and tell him that you give him a history lesson on WWII.
Q: What did the Jewish person say when he beat me in a race?
A: Eat my dust.
What happens when the Twin Towers breathe? They collapse like an orphan with stage 4 cystic fibrosis who lives in the streets of Africa.
When did the cheetah steal from the bakery?
On Black Friday!!!
What happened when two invisible giants knocked over their blocks?
9/11.
When I was born, I saw you at the adoption center alone.
That day your dad got milk. 😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬
What did Stephen Hawking say when he died?
Boo Boo Doo.
Hi guys, jokes for sister.
So I was listening to a song about "I hate you, are annoying, sister. I'm small and I'm smart," and when I showed it to her, she killed me, and later I was dancing and crying.
What's the most annoying thing in the world?
When you're told you're still qualified to live.
Yo mama so ugly that when she went to an ugly contest, they said she wasn’t allowed because no professionals were allowed.
What happens when you work in the Twin Towers? It connects to airplane WiFi.
When the card declines on child insurance.
Why is a ball rolling when you put it on a hill?
Because it is circle.
When you get home and see your parents with your grades in their hands.
Twenty minutes later, they're slapping you with the belt.